Head of the household.
Whiskas
Curiouser & Curiouser
I first heard of this general notion from another message board. It said 2 times. However I lowered it to about 1.5 for the black and brown community.
The rough reason is 2 folds:
1, women need to take time to have children and for the most part do more in child rearing which doesn't bring income.
2, our society is still patriarchy and men on average make more than women.
I agree with Meanie the concept of "the head of household" is phasing out but it is not completely out yet. Quite a few men in this thread seem to like to hold on to it.
Keep the Kitty warm! What hen?! Get it right, Meanie.
Joshie Kahn
"I can fix that"
My bad kitty, I can't always be on 1, good write up though.
why doesnt the mother have a job that pays her for maternity leave?
i ain't even gonna go on the defensive...cuz it sounds good.....
it just don't always be like that.....especially if the woman in the relationship has the ability to make more.....
should a woman not be ambitious in the workplace??
regardless of what her s/o is brining home.... if in her career she gets the opportunity to make more than him should she pass on it to maintain the hierarchy of the household??
I mean when my wife got the promotion to assistant director from classroom teacher....i ain't feel slighted cuz she jumped over me in pay....
nigga i did cartwheels and somersaults....
i feel like how much someone brings home should have very little to do with household decisions.....
Whiskas
Curiouser & Curiouser
Hopefully it does but most maternity pays are not at 100%. Furthermore, maternity leave is only the tip of the iceberg.
Having a single child takes a lot physically and mentally for at least a year out of a woman's most productive, career ascending years. And then the new born, infant and toddler years are no cake walk either, and bother mothers and fathers know that, but on average mothers tend to do more.
And if a family has multiple child it will easily take a decade out of a woman's life that she cannot focus 100% on her career.
i disagree
and you are painting some very broad strokes here
well who determines when her most productive years are? are you assuming she is in her mid 20's? early 30's? whats her profession? too many variables to make a blanket statement like your doing.
Whiskas
Curiouser & Curiouser
I personally think your family sounds like a very loving and well adjusted family. Kudos to both you and your wife.
Whiskas
Curiouser & Curiouser
Yes, I think 20's and 30's are extremely important, in almost all professions. Unfortunately having children by and large take away career building. Many women succeed despite of having children not because of it. It is a disadvantage we women have to deal with.
I do not believe the title of "the head of the household" unconditionally belongs to the man. In fact, I believe monetarily a man needs to contribute more to be on mere equal footing, let alone being the head of the household.
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nah b
what if she, like Du said, is the one who is on a faster track in her career and has more earning potential? Why does a man's input hinge on how much he brings home? Nothing wrong with embracing your woman if its clear she is going to be the one with the higher salary. But what if she bad with money? then what?
Whiskas
Curiouser & Curiouser
We discussed this once in pm.
Whiskas
Curiouser & Curiouser
Of course there is nothing wrong with it, as long as both sides are happy.
To add to it, I believe the opposite applies too, meaning if a woman makes too much less than a man, she loses leverage too. For example, SAHMs are often told to have a contengency plan for this exact reason. The good news is when a couple are in a loving and happy relationship it won't make much of a difference.
Joshie Kahn
"I can fix that"
Uh oh
im sorry, but this sounds like some 1950's stuff
If you both are honest enough with yourselves, and honest with each other, budgeting for this easily avoids this