Would You Be Content With Being Single?

@HellCzar

Why are u not doing anything constructive to address these things u r clearly aware of? If u can write at length on all these negative things about u n paint a vivid ain't shit image... what is the holdup in makin moves to handle the issues?

More importantly:!Y r u worried bout some chick when u seem content with negative self image?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Goldie 🔫💰
BNE said:
@HellCzar

Why are u not doing anything constructive to address these things u r clearly aware of? If u can write at length on all these negative things about u n paint a vivid ain't shit image... what is the holdup in makin moves to handle the issues?

More importantly:!Y r u worried bout some chick when u seem content with negative self image?
Click to expand...

Idk really. Im not content with my negative self image tho. Ive been working on that for awhile. But it used to be lower. I mean i dont think im the worst but i am hard on self.
And i met her at a weird time and she became very important to me. I have been thinking tho and realized if i concentrate on self not just mentally but time wise ill be better off.
 
wow, i can relate to a lot of that homie...but i also talk a lot...so i try to keep my wife abreast when i'm feeling low and what not
 
Dupacalypse said:
wow, i can relate to a lot of that homie...but i also talk a lot...so i try to keep my wife abreast when i'm feeling low and what not
Click to expand...
But ur self esteem is high enough to be able to talk about ur good qualities too, n u chose a partner that believes in them,n doesn't need convincing. that don't seem to be the case here.
HellCzar said:
I need to communicate much better with her. She is very open minded I am too but she is more than I am. And I think she feels my views are manufactured depending on my audience. If i could just effectively express to her that when I met her I was in a 2 year process of opening my mind to things outside of me mayne she wouldnt view me as wishy washy she wants stability.
Click to expand...

this is why doin ur inner work first is so important.
HellCzar said:
Long time ago back in like elementary
Click to expand...
It isn't too late but if it's that deep, n it's got this many layers, u gotta fix ur priorities. cross the relationship bridge when ur self esteem has been rehabilitated
 
  • Like
Reactions: Goldie 🔫💰
HellCzar said:
Long time ago back in like elementary
Click to expand...

Figured that. The older i get tge more i believe public schooling is the worst thing that could have happened to us....

Im not saying education is bad, but the social aspect of it is terrible....
 
BNE said:
But ur self esteem is high enough to be able to talk about ur good qualities too, n u chose a partner that believes in them,n doesn't need convincing. that don't seem to be the case here.

I think you right fam. Not to sound cliche but i have to get right within. I guess thats what folks mean when they say glow up. If me an her still cool then hey ill see. But not not working on me will just lead to headache


this is why doin ur inner work first is so important.

It isn't too late but if it's that deep, n it's got this many layers, u gotta fix ur priorities. cross the relationship bridge when ur self esteem has been rehabilitated
Click to expand...
 
HellCzar said:
I need to communicate much better with her. She is very open minded I am too but she is more than I am. And I think she feels my views are manufactured depending on my audience. If i could just effectively express to her that when I met her I was in a 2 year process of opening my mind to things outside of me mayne she wouldnt view me as wishy washy she wants stability.

Also when i have a problem with something instead of addressing it then i tend to let it go thinking ill get over it because thats what adults are supposed to do. But its not right because it comes out later and bitter and everybody feels bad.

I want to know her the rest of my life but anytime i feel like im a burden or that she is i want to bounce. Only to miss her again. Never want to feel im holding her back but if im not expressing that how will she know?

Ambition level she knows im stagnant but i got used to this routine im in. I need to break out of it for myself. And then i can bring others with me. If I want her to rock with me for the long haul that is.

And lastly i have to not be so negative to an extreme. I take everything to heart but badly.

That was alot lawd
Click to expand...
You are on the right path. You didn't blame her for any of your perceived shortcomings. I too am a person that likes to figure things out on my own first before I say something but I have learned that it can't work in a relationship. So I try to express myself initially but let her know that I am still processing things in my head. As far as your ambition level that is not a real measure of who you are. As long as you are not at the point where you are willing to be homeless before you make certain decisions you will be fine. Also you can not make anyone happy other than yourself. You will be surprised how happy the people around you will be when you are happy with yourself.
 
Judge_Judah said:
Figured that. The older i get tge more i believe public schooling is the worst thing that could have happened to us....

Im not saying education is bad, but the social aspect of it is terrible....
Click to expand...

And then having any sort of mental issue makes things so much harder. I have ADD and didnt know why i couldnt just focus in the classes i didnt like. Shit was tough cuz i knew i wasnt dumb. Could ace any history test. And completely lost in Math.
 
HellCzar said:
Lol im just not one to post all the positive stuff. I always took it as bragging. But might be my negative disposition
Click to expand...
Stating facts is not bragging in an open forum. We are all different people with different lives and if someone is upset about what you have accomplished does that say something about you or them. Materialism is not the best thing if that is all you want but there is nothing wrong with having things as long as you are not a slave to them .
 
HellCzar said:
And then having any sort of mental issue makes things so much harder. I have ADD and didnt know why i couldnt just focus in the classes i didnt like. Shit was tough cuz i knew i wasnt dumb. Could ace any history test. And completely lost in Math.
Click to expand...
ADD is real but for like of a better term just think of it as three letters. It is something you have but it is not who you are. I hope I don't sound like it is easy to deal with but at least you know what it is. Now figure out a way to fight it so to speak. Identify how it affects you and fight it. You seem like a strong person and you have made it this far so you are a fighter. Use your strengths to combat your weaknesses and never be afraid of change.
 
I don't know if I would get married again BUT I don't won't lie and say I would be content with being alone for the rest of my life.

When you're older and not running the streets no longer you look at life different and know you need that extra companionship. The feeling of knowing you have someone to lean on and when you don't have others is an addictive feeling.
 
i think this is where the disconnect is for me

i never equated being single as being alone, but i guess the traditional definition that unless you are married, you are single
 
AP21 said:
i think this is where the disconnect is for me

i never equated being single as being alone, but i guess the traditional definition that unless you are married, you are single
Click to expand...


At the age you're at now being single doesn't mean you're alone.


Ffwd your life in your 60's your daughter is grown and your friends and family are gone or with their friends and family and it's just you. Ask yourself is that something you would be content with? If so then you're straight if not there lies the Problem.
 
  • Like
Reactions: AP2.5
i was raised as an only child, i'm used to being by myself, i still got to the movies and restaurants by myself all the time...i had to travel to texas once for work... had a blast...

i mean i love doing shit with my wife, but i'm totally content with doing shit solo too....
 
Dupacalypse said:
i was raised as an only child, i'm used to being by myself, i still got to the movies and restaurants by myself all the time...i had to travel to texas once for work... had a blast...

i mean i love doing shit with my wife, but i'm totally content with doing shit solo too....
Click to expand...


I was raised an only child as well and I still like to be to myself and I'm mad quiet. Still that longing to have a companion as you get up in age will come. Every single person I know wants to have what you and your wifey have maybe not at the moment but they all want to settle down at some point. All my niggas who have mad chicks always tell me they would drop 20 bad bitches to have one good woman to ride out with.



@Dupacalypse you already know my situation so I can speak from experience on this. Having that person to hold you down on the long run is addictive.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back