COMMUNITY Toxic Masculinity vs Healthy Masculinity

[Dwayne]

Is being an alpha male a form of toxic masculinity or healthy masculinity?

nothing wrong with being the alpha

 

[LUCIEN]

Huh?

The Shakespeare play where the lead character, persuaded by his wife, murders the king to usurp the throne. Being "Alpha" is bad a lot of the time, even when it benefits our other half

 

[5th Letter]

The Shakespeare play where the lead character, persuaded by his wife, murders the king to usurp the throne. Being "Alpha" is bad a lot of the time, even when it benefits our other half

Oh ok

 

[shutupGabi]

I can’t accept toxic masculinity because these same women/feminists aren’t labeling negative behavior by women as toxic femininity.

I've honestly never used the phrase "toxic masculinity" in a serious way....think ive used the shit twice and both times I was joking. however it's not fair to act as if the merits of the phrase itself don't exist because you don't like who's using it. What is now called toxic masculinity was called a bully or a tool a decade or 2 ago.

And to toxic femininity....look at the Kardashians. They have millions of followers but also get millions of people calling them out for what they represent. Women do call shit like that out.

 

[SeaSnake]

Weirdos

 

[konceptjones]

So you agree that certain behaviors are toxic for men, you just don't like it being called toxic masculinity? That's just being nit picky as fuck for no reason. I know what the dialogue around toxic masculinity is and I don't agree with all or even most of the shit that comes from the loudest, and often most wrong, people who rant and rave about it. That doesn't mean that I don't recognize what the actual point of the discussion is and recognize that certain things we are taught as young boys about being a man and manhood in general aren't really good for you as a person.

The problem stems from the fact that pretty much every behavior deemed as "Toxic masculinity" exists within both sexes, but only spoken about with reference to males. If it exists with both sexes, then it's toxic behavior.

 

[SeaSnake]

The problem stems from the fact that pretty much every behavior deemed as "Toxic masculinity" exists within both sexes, but only spoken about with reference to males. If it exists with both sexes, then it's toxic behavior.

So dont adress it all or address the ways the genders do the same thing but different.

 

[Playmaker88]

I've honestly never used the phrase "toxic masculinity" in a serious way....think ive used the shit twice and both times I was joking. however it's not fair to act as if the merits of the phrase itself don't exist because you don't like who's using it. What is now called toxic masculinity was called a bully or a tool a decade or 2 ago.

And to toxic femininity....look at the Kardashians. They have millions of followers but also get millions of people calling them out for what they represent. Women do call shit like that out.

There is no "thingism" in the bolded thought it was attributed to that person not to a particular sex..

as far as your bit on toxic femininity as far as the Kardashians. i dont think thats applies..as the label thats being slung around.. its just opportunism mch the same as many "entertainers"and reality tv stars

 

[5th Letter]

I've honestly never used the phrase "toxic masculinity" in a serious way....think ive used the shit twice and both times I was joking. however it's not fair to act as if the merits of the phrase itself don't exist because you don't like who's using it. What is now called toxic masculinity was called a bully or a tool a decade or 2 ago.

And to toxic femininity....look at the Kardashians. They have millions of followers but also get millions of people calling them out for what they represent. Women do call shit like that out.

My problem with the phrase is that black men somehow someway (and not surprising) is now the face of toxic masculinity, and with that the underlining bs behind it.

 

[SeaSnake]

My problem with the phrase is that black men somehow someway (and not surprising) is now the face of toxic masculinity, and with that the underlining bs behind it.

Are you saying black men are the face because white people made it that way? Or do you associate more with black people and started seeing black women call out things? To me white folks are the poster child fir shit like this almost always

 

[The Mad Titan]

So you agree that certain behaviors are toxic for men, you just don't like it being called toxic masculinity? That's just being nit picky as fuck for no reason. I know what the dialogue around toxic masculinity is and I don't agree with all or even most of the shit that comes from the loudest, and often most wrong, people who rant and rave about it. That doesn't mean that I don't recognize what the actual point of the discussion is and recognize that certain things we are taught as young boys about being a man and manhood in general aren't really good for you as a person.

Foh with this shit. Words matter nigga. This whole "toxic masculinity" shit is designed to create an automatic association of the two words - toxic and masculine (male). You know kinda like white ppl do with "black on black crime"

Aint shit nit picky about calling out bullshit that tries to attribute certain behavior to a certain group of ppl as if said behaviors are exclusive to them. Its a fucking marketing ploy and doesnt have shit to do with we as black men gaining a better undstanding of true manhood. The whole catch phrase is meant to tear us down and make us docile (I see its worked for some).

You call it nit pcky, I call it bullshit. Tomatoes tomotoes

 

[SeaSnake]

Foh with this shit. Words matter nigga. This whole "toxic masculinity" shit is designed to create an automatic association of the two words - toxic and masculine (male). You know kinda like white ppl do with "black on black crime"

Aint shit nit picky about calling out bullshit that tries to attribute certain behavior to a certain group of ppl as if said behaviors are exclusive to them. Its a fucking marketing ploy and doesnt have shit to do with we as black men gaining a better undstanding of true manhood. The whole catch phrase is meant to tear us down and make us docile (I see its worked for some).

You call it nit pcky, I call it bullshit. Tomatoes tomotoes

So what things you see that harm men when people speak on toxic masculinity? I feel like yall use extreme and rare examples to make these points.

 

[5th Letter]

Are you saying black men are the face because white people made it that way? Or do you associate more with black people and started seeing black women call out things? To me white folks are the poster child fir shit like this almost always

No. White feminists started using the term against white men. Black feminists picked it up to attack black men, but since white people (men) control the narrative due to them running the media, they along with the white feminists used the term to attack black men. The white ran “black” websites like The Root use the term to attack black men while absolving white men of the same issues.

 

[SeaSnake]

No. White feminists started using the term against white men. Black feminists picked it up to attack black men, but since white people (men) control the narrative due to them running the media, they along with the white feminists used the term to attack black men. The white ran “black” websites like The Root use the term to attack black men while absolving white men of the same issues.

Ok i see what your saying. So how does the community really supposed to address these long term gender issues. If its started by outsiders then they only exploited something that was already there right?

 

[Soul_Rattler]

If its started by outsiders then they only exploited something that was already there right?

If it was started by outsiders, outsiders are the problem.

Get white people out of black relationships. Also, no offense to you personally, but get non-heterosexuals out of black heterosexual relationships.

 

[SeaSnake]

If it was started by outsiders, outsiders are the problem.

Get white people out of black relationships. Also, no offense to you personally, but get non-heterosexuals out of black heterosexual relationships.

Like black heterosexuals aint in folks business or have any impact outside of relationships. Its a problem that is refusing to be addressed. Yall shut down any real conversation and seem to just whine about being attacked over view points. Because admitting men black men have any problem outside of overt racism is foreign to you. And its soft. First reaction to this subject is "well what about what women do too" to deflect.

 

[konceptjones]

Like black heterosexuals aint in folks business or have any impact outside of relationships. Its a problem that is refusing to be addressed. Yall shut down any real conversation and seem to just whine about being attacked over view points. Because admitting men black men have any problem outside of overt racism is foreign to you. And its soft. First reaction to this subject is "well what about what women do too" to deflect.

"people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones"

"... He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone..." - John 8:7

"The difference between my darkness and your darkness is that I can look at my own badness in the face and accept its existence while you are busy covering your mirror with a white linen sheet. The difference between my sins and your sins is that when I sin I know I'm sinning while you have actually fallen prey to your own fabricated illusions." - C. JoyBell C.

"Often those that criticize others reveal what he himself lacks." - Shannon L. Alder

"People that have trust issues only need to look in the mirror. There they will meet the one person that will betray them the most" - Shannon L. Adler

and finally...

"How dare a person or group of people point the finger of blame at another for any atrocity, yet they themselves would be guilty of the same. Would this not be hypocrisy? Not to those pointing the finger for they believe their own transgressions to be of noble nature or of no fault of their own." - KonceptJones

 

[Soul_Rattler]

Like black heterosexuals aint in folks business or have any impact outside of relationships. Its a problem that is refusing to be addressed. Yall shut down any real conversation and seem to just whine about being attacked over view points. Because admitting men black men have any problem outside of overt racism is foreign to you. And its soft. First reaction to this subject is "well what about what women do too" to deflect.

Ironically, you started your reply with a deflection which is in bold.

But that's okay because I'm in agreement that people need to stay out of business that doesn't concern them. I'm a straight black man. I can assure you it ain't none of my business what two gay men do together. Or two gay women, or white people, or Hispanics, etc. I may have my thoughts on the matter but I keep that to myself because it ain't my damn business and it doesn't affect me at all.

Can you say the same?

 

[5th Letter]

Ok i see what your saying. So how does the community really supposed to address these long term gender issues. If its started by outsiders then they only exploited something that was already there right?

Are you asking “naive” questions now?

 

[SeaSnake]

Ironically, you started your reply with a deflection which is in bold.

But that's okay because I'm in agreement that people need to stay out of business that doesn't concern them. I'm a straight black man. I can assure you it ain't none of my business what two gay men do together. Or two gay women, or white people, or Hispanics, etc. I may have my thoughts on the matter but I keep that to myself because it ain't my damn business and it doesn't affect me at all.

Can you say the same?

No i cant. Being that im still with women and have a girl child. Relationships with the other gender aint just sex related either. Are things not interconnected?