Child Support - Fair or Foul?

[Golden]

this is my point too....

in most situation.....most... not the wild exceptions....it's mostly about the money....

there are other benefits...but if it's solely about the money, i'd rather have an set amount be taken directly out my direct deposit and placed into her account, so that she gets every penny to the dollar than have it be washed thru the government

and i just can't picture myself messing with someone who wouldn't understand that..

everytime i pick up a second job i give them a voided check to my wife's solo account....

that's her money....

and we always joke that would be her child support if she left me

I think everyone should go through the state.

Do y'all dislike prenups too? "Good people shouldn't need contracts to keep them from taking each other to the cleaners"?

 

[AP3.0]

Trini, make the threads mayne.

Massa done already beat us in front of company

 

[Loquacious]

It's many exceptions and a lot of the times yea, women are out here trying to get back and the men but their are women who legit needs the financial help, trifling or not.

A kid is made by two parents and one parent shouldn't have to bear it alone. So if the state gotta get involved, so be it. Some of us wouldn't go that route. I've even discussed taking him off of child support but we made another decision that it's better to keep him on child support because my son gets Medicaid and he can't afford to pay insurance through his job for him and our son.

Don't sound too trifling to me, sounds like a smart ass decision. I don't like the way child support is abused and some of the rules of it but I do like how it helped me in certain situations. If I didn't go the route I went at the beginning, my son's dad wouldn't be on child support.

 

[Duwop]

I think everyone should go through the state.

Do y'all dislike prenups too? "Good people shouldn't need contracts to keep them from taking each other to the cleaners"?

i don't like prenups either.....

it's like insurance.....

if you ain't willing to risk it all.......don't do it.....

i feel like the need for a prenup is evidence that we don't need to be married to begin with

 

[Golden]

i don't like prenups either.....

it's like insurance.....

if you ain't willing to risk it all.......don't do it.....

i feel like the need for a prenup is evidence that we don't need to be married to begin with

lol

some people just like order and structure.

at least you're consistent.

 

[Loquacious]

i don't like prenups either.....

it's like insurance.....

if you ain't willing to risk it all.......don't do it.....

i feel like the need for a prenup is evidence that we don't need to be married to begin with

So if you built an empire all by yourself then got married then divorced, you'd give up half?

You think she'd deserve it?

 

[AP3.0]

i don't like prenups either.....

it's like insurance.....

if you ain't willing to risk it all.......don't do it.....

i feel like the need for a prenup is evidence that we don't need to be married to begin with

And you were doing so good before this post lol

It's like insurance? So you riding around town without insurance on your car? You wanna risk it all? You got life insurance to protect your family in the event of your untimely demise? You wanna risk it all?

 

[Knock_Twice]

see, you just did it again. "good dudes shouldn't be going through the state". if they're already doing all that, doing it through the state just makes it automatic. you're vilifying child support via the state.

plenty of "good dudes" voluntarily go through the state, and not out of fear but convenience. you're still describing child support through official channels as inherently messed up.

it's cool that informal child support is what you personally advocate for but that aint the intrinsically superior choice.

even in the case of court ordered child support... checks only get garnished when they haven't paid for a while. wage garnishing is a last resort.

I like that you're giving them the benefit of the doubt and using descriptors like "the good dudes" like they're victims for not paying child support lol

"the good women" who punctured condoms and lied about BC to get pregnant.
"the good dudes" who skipped 2 years of child support and had to get their wages garnished.

that is beautiful. we should all have advocates like Knock Twice.

Going through the state is a bad look in some eyes in this country and I'm drifting off target, but I'll just say this real quick, when you're applying for loans and other shit to build wealth and you put that down on paper that you are responsible for child support payments, that piece of info can work against you from getting approved and moving on to the next step, so again, I say, good dudes shouldn't be going to court.

A good dude doing all that may not be shoving out 450-700 (maybe more) a month outta his check, it may not cost a good dude that to raise their child, so why send that good dude to court to get hit up for more money than what it cost to raise his child per month?

Good dudes, when I speak about them, are the ones at the PTA meetings, picking up the kid from daycare, taking the kid to b-day parties, attending practices and school programs, etc. I mean being in the child's life like there wasn't a break-up.

So why should a good dude who I just gave some qualities of should be sent to court again?

 

[Duwop]

It's many exceptions and a lot of the times yea, women are out here trying to get back and the men but their are women who legit needs the financial help, trifling or not.

A kid is made by two parents and one parent shouldn't have to bear it alone. So if the state gotta get involved, so be it. Some of us wouldn't go that route. I've even discussed taking him off of child support but we made another decision that it's better to keep him on child support because my son gets Medicaid and he can't afford to pay insurance through his job for him and our son.

Don't sound too trifling to me, sounds like a smart ass decision. I don't like the way child support is abused and some of the rules of it but I do like how it helped me in certain situations. If I didn't go the route I went at the beginning, my son's dad wouldn't be on child support.

yall talked, weighed the benefits, and made a decision together that was the most beneficial for both of yall.

that's great and responsible parenting. and an overall great job at adulting.

in this exception i wouldn't call either of yall trifling.

so i was proved wrong....in this one...particular case.....

but if you want, you can make a thread and list other scenarios and i can give you my trifling rating on it......how much is on him, how much is on her, and what is shared......

cuz i'm positive yall an exception...something like 1 in 10,000

 

[Duwop]

So if you built an empire all by yourself then got married then divorced, you'd give up half?

You think she'd deserve it?

like i said, if i wasn't willing to risk it, i wouldn't marry her

if i married her, then lose it.....obviously somewhere i fucked up and brought this on myself

 

[Duwop]

And you were doing so good before this post lol

It's like insurance? So you riding around town without insurance on your car? You wanna risk it all? You got life insurance to protect your family in the event of your untimely demise? You wanna risk it all?

i think insurance is a racket....

i still pay into it, but i think it's a racket

 

[Knock_Twice]

see, you just did it again. "good dudes shouldn't be going through the state". if they're already doing all that, doing it through the state just makes it automatic. you're vilifying child support via the state.

plenty of "good dudes" voluntarily go through the state, and not out of fear but convenience. you're still describing child support through official channels as inherently messed up.

it's cool that informal child support is what you personally advocate for but that aint the intrinsically superior choice.

even in the case of court ordered child support... checks only get garnished when they haven't paid for a while. wage garnishing is a last resort.

I like that you're giving them the benefit of the doubt and using descriptors like "the good dudes" like they're victims for not paying child support lol

"the good women" who punctured condoms and lied about BC to get pregnant.
"the good dudes" who skipped 2 years of child support and had to get their wages garnished.

that is beautiful. we should all have advocates like Knock Twice.

Checks don't get garnished? huh

Everytime that payment is dude it's getting garnished up until that child hits 18, caught up or behind, dude walking out that parking lot with a line on his check which is dedicated to Child Support (may read something differently than what I typed) but he's prolly pissed off when he opens it

 

[Knock_Twice]

@BNE

You want that good dude to go the court, when most of the time, the dude's check is garnished, some of his money goes to the kid and the other goes to the woman getting her hair fixed or paying for an outfit, nails getting done or some new shoes for her, bottle money, car payment/insurance, cell phone payment etc. and guess what, You think she's telling the dude where the extra money is going or the courts?

So again, how going to the court is helping this good dude out again?

Yall betta know the game and stop living in that dreamy ass world that yall think this is out here Lol

 

[Golden]

Checks don't get garnished? huh

Everytime that payment is dude it's getting garnished up until that child hits 18, caught up or behind, dude walking out that parking lot with a line on his check which is dedicated to Child Support (may read something differently than what I typed) but he's prolly pissed off when he opens it

Are you using wage garnishing as a catch all for official child support payments? Wage garnishing is it's own step, and a step taken after someone hasn't been paying court ordered child support for a while.

It doesn't go straight from putting papers on you to wage garnishing. wage garnishing happens when someone hasn't paid the child support that they were ordered by the court to pay. wage garnishing is when they intervene and deduct it from your paycheck prior to it reaching you, so that you no longer have the option of being late on it.

 

[Duwop]

I don't think I'd ever remarry either

 

[Judge Dread]

@BNE getting the government involved in your situation is showing a lack of belief in the other party. That persons words should be enough or you are dating the same kind of trifling person @Savage Du was referring too. With that said how is @Savage Du listening to Jr Gong and not learning. Please listen to Nail Pon Cross again before you say every woman that put a man on papers showed signs of something that you should have seen in the dating stage to make her not be worthy of having your child. Now I do agree that you should really pay attention to a person before you have a child with them but sometimes things happen. ( Jah spared me of these things and I count my blessings). The system once involved is a lose lose for both parties. Because the person whose money is being taken may say I don't need to give you another red cent and the person whose on the receiving end may feel it is never enough. Apply the laws of common decency and put the child first and the couple should be able to come up with something fair.

 

[Golden]

@BNE getting the government involved in your situation is showing a lack of belief in the other party. That persons words should be enough or you are dating the same kind of trifling person @Savage Du was referring too. With that said how is @Savage Du listening to Jr Gong and not learning. Please listen to Nail Pon Cross again before you say every woman that put a man on papers showed signs of something that you should have seen in the dating stage to make her not be worthy of having your child. Now I do agree that you should really pay attention to a person before you have a child with them but sometimes things happen. ( Jah spared me of these things and I count my blessings). The system once involved is a lose lose for both parties. Because the person whose money is being taken may say I don't need to give you another red cent and the person whose on the receiving end may feel it is never enough. Apply the laws of common decency and put the child first and the couple should be able to come up with something fair.

if that's the case, the same can be said for marriage. love should be enough. why the need to put a paper on it and get the state involved?

if it's about the commitment, why not just a religious/spiritual ceremony? why so little faith in the strength of the relationship that you'd make your relationship legally binding and requiring divorce to end? why can't it be trusted to last forever without the intervention of the state?

why involve the system in personal affairs like romantic relationships? getting married is a sign of trife, by that logic.

 

[Knock_Twice]

Are you using wage garnishing as a catch all for official child support payments? Wage garnishing is it's own step, and a step taken after someone hasn't been paying court ordered child support for a while.

It doesn't go straight from putting papers on you to wage garnishing. wage garnishing happens when someone hasn't paid the child support that they were ordered by the court to pay. wage garnishing is when they intervene and deduct it from your paycheck prior to it reaching you, so that you no longer have the option of being late on it.

If a woman files in Jan 2017, and the court date is in Aug 2017, and the judge rules in her favor, depending on the other noise from the case that was mentioned and rule in her favor, but the dude at that moment will have to cut a check for that amount you owe to that woman ($800 x 8) up until Aug 2017 and the next month in Sept, your check will get hit up to cover that 800 until she finds favor in her heart to take her ass down there and remove you off them papers.

 

[Golden]

If a woman files in Jan 2017, and the court date is in Aug 2017, and the judge rules in her favor, depending on the other noise from the case, you at that moment will have to cut a check for that amount you owe that woman ($800 x 8) up until Aug 2017 and the next month in Sept, your check will get hit up.

That doesn't mean your wage is automatically going to get garnished. only if it reaches that point of debt accumulation.

 

[Knock_Twice]

That doesn't mean your wage is automatically going to get garnished. only if it reaches that point of debt accumulation.

So when Sept arrives, when dude is caught up with the payments, how will she get her payment for that 800 dollars using my example?