The Birth Control Thread….we need to have a SERIOUS conversation about it:

[Royal]

I'd rather have the experience lessened over being forced to experience fatherhood.

That's fair, but for me I might as well not have sex if it's a horrible experience.

But to your point I have experienced a man change completely up on me after news of a pregnancy
I have made the mistake assuming that men have self control and if they don't want a child they wouldn't bust inside you. And I assumed that if we in a committed relationship and we fucking raw your ok with having a baby, even if it wasn't planned.

But men change up imo

 

[mike030270]

That's fair, but for me I might as well not have sex if it's a horrible experience.

But to your point I have experienced a man change completely up on me after news of a pregnancy
I have made the mistake assuming that men have self control and if they don't want a child they wouldn't bust inside you. And I assumed that if we in a committed relationship and we fucking raw your ok with having a baby, even if it wasn't planned.

But men change up imo

I mean... those are logical assumptions lol

 

[Royal]

I mean... those are logical assumptions lol

Yeah but it's on both parties , in my 20s I definitely was being sexually irresponsible

And I would say that up until 2 - 3 years ago I never really paid attention to how the men i was dating answered the do you want kids question.

And I have learned the actions or what it looks like when a man is serious about not bringing in a child when he not ready

I may have been with a guy and despite the words he is saying, I could tell he Didn't want a kid and if a kid came he might bitch up and be absent. But the idea of a baby wasn't something I was against and I did think babies bring people closer etc etc. But it's not always like that for men .

So as much as it's the man responsibility, I have learned that alot of men shows signs , they want to party but definitely not staying to help clean up

 

[ZMaKEa]

That's fair, but for me I might as well not have sex if it's a horrible experience.

But to your point I have experienced a man change completely up on me after news of a pregnancy
I have made the mistake assuming that men have self control and if they don't want a child they wouldn't bust inside you. And I assumed that if we in a committed relationship and we fucking raw your ok with having a baby, even if it wasn't planned.

But men change up imo

See...

The main reason for the "I ain't shit talk. You better not expect me to be there for you."

Other men on ABW hit 26 and listened to too much Boys2Men, watched Waiting to Exhale with they Momma and started trying to " be better".

That's why they got baby mommas now. They act like women just don't assume men willing to bust in them have no problem with children and they gladly accept that logic because these niggas all lied to them to get raw sex.

"Of course I'll be there for you. I love you."

Then deep down inside scared as hell knowing he don't wanna be with her long term.

Then be trying to track her damn cycle his damn self, asking random questions like, "What's your average body temperature?"

Lol, like, I remember a girl I was fucking with said I would be good dad the way I took care of my puppy. Right after Purple Rain came out.

I told her I like dogs because they die at 15 and I give them up for adoption when I get tired of them.

Lol, she always had condoms on deck after that lol. Nah, after escaping the crazy ass 70s with no babies. I wasn't playing.

 

[Royal]

See...

The main reason for the "I ain't shit talk. You better not expect me to be there for you."

Other men on ABW hit 26 and listened to too much Boys2Men, watched Waiting to Exhale with they Momma and started trying to " be better".

That's why they got baby mommas now. They act like women just don't assume men willing to bust in them have no problem with children and they gladly accept that logic because these niggas all lied to them to get raw sex.

"Of course I'll be there for you. I love you."

Then deep down inside scared as hell.

Then be trying to track her damn cycle his damn self, asking random questions like, "What's your average body temperature?"

Lol, like, I remember a girl I was fucking with said I would be good dad the way I took care of my puppy.

I told her I like dogs because they die at 15.

Lol, she always had condoms on deck after that lol.

Yup females be knowing for the most that the dude might be flighty lol. Or you learn over time. Even "good " dudes be on some flighty shit too.

I definitely thought it was a thug,street negro trait..but naw all men are capable

I remember when my mentality switched because I use to feel all speacial if a dude I was with be like I want you to have my baby. In my mind I am thinking oh you gotta really like me to say lol

Man the last brother that said that I hurt his feelings, like don't say that fake ass shit to me lol
I pointed out all the ways in which he really didn't want nor was ready...saying it cause it sounds good lol

 

[ZMaKEa]

Yup females be knowing for the most that the dude might be flighty lol. Or you learn over time. Even "good " dudes be on some flighty shit too.

I definitely thought it was a thug,street negro trait..but naw all men are capable

I remember when my mentality switched because I use to feel all speacial if a dude I was with be like I want you to have my baby. In my mind I am thinking oh you gotta really like me to say lol

Man the last brother that said that I hurt his feelings, like don't say that fake ass shit to me lol
I pointed out all the ways in which he really didn't want nor was ready...saying it cause it sounds good lol

Lol, they act like my old ass don't be telling the truth.

If you tell a woman you don't want no kids and you are gonna be the worst baby daddy ever and all the fun is gonna stop...

8 outta 10 women are gonna be grown as hell and shut all the random ass easy ass sex down because they got damn self ain't tryna have a kid.

They gonna be the most straightforward about sex, what they wanna eat, where they wanna go because they know they are just there for a good time. They ain't gonna fuck up their good time by trying to see if the man is husband and father material.

She gonna save that energy for the motherfucker that she want and looking for

All the women I had the "I ain't shit, protect yourself at all times" speech ended up moving on and I ain't have no problems.

They all were like, "Daddy, I want a husband." And dipped within 2 years. Raised nice families. Why I'ma fuck that up by pretending to wanna be with them for the long haul?

Women know the type of man they want to have to procreate with, it's one of them reliable, generous, stable ass, yes ma'am, no ma'am motherfuckers or a rich motherfucker.

Dudes that try to be a "good man" with all this bullshit about responsibilities and shit, just be wasting a woman's time and creating hopeless romantic baby mommas that break bad in child support court.

Then be like, "Why she do me like that? I was a good man."

Because you fucking lied. You said you was Super-Man but you not even Clark Kent.

 

[Mister B. M. Ed.]

Update: Family member called me. The moms-to-be is going crazy. Apparently, she either wants the abortion or to carry the baby full term with ZERO doctor visits.

Duke is calling me, stressed the fuck out. He don't even wanna be with her anymore. He wants to to help her as best he can, but he says she's emotionally unstable to deal it. Don't even wanna be with her anymore.

Goddamn shame. ALL of this could've been avoided.

"Guard Your Seed!"

 

[ZMaKEa]

Update: Family member called me. The moms-to-be is going crazy. Apparently, she either wants the abortion or to carry the baby full term with ZERO doctor visits.

Duke is calling me, stressed the fuck out. He don't even wanna be with her anymore. He wants to to help her as best he can, but he says she's emotionally unstable to deal it. Don't even wanna be with her anymore.

Goddamn shame. ALL of this could've been avoided.

"Guard Your Seed!"

Lol, like I said, have the fucking talk and all the hysterics stop.

Her: I either want an abortion or I'ma just not go to the doctor.
Me: I don't give a fuck what you do.
Her: You don't care about me and the baby?
Me: Didn't I tell you I don't want any kids? Didn't I tell you I'ma pick me every single time?
Her: You had unprotected sex with me.
Me: So? Plenty of people have unprotected sex without the intention of having children.
Her: You don't love me?
Me: Nope. I told you that when I said I don't want children. I only love me.
Her: But then why did you.. You know what, forget it. I should just get an abortion.
Me: Sounds like your best option. Call me if you need a recommendation. Good luck.

 

[AP3.0]

Update: Family member called me. The moms-to-be is going crazy. Apparently, she either wants the abortion or to carry the baby full term with ZERO doctor visits.

Duke is calling me, stressed the fuck out. He don't even wanna be with her anymore. He wants to to help her as best he can, but he says she's emotionally unstable to deal it. Don't even wanna be with her anymore.

Goddamn shame. ALL of this could've been avoided.

"Guard Your Seed!"

Lol

This is a classic dramatic situation

IDK what the abortion laws are there but if he wants to call her bluff, but he has to be dead ass serious and willing to spend the bread but tell her he'll take her to the clinic to get it done and he'll pay for it.

There's absolutely no way she can go full term with a baby and not see a doctor. She's talking shit

She's trying to see what he's going to do. More than likely she wants to keep this baby but probably scared he's gonna bail. When a chick wants an abortion, she's gonna get one.

 

[Mister B. M. Ed.]

Don't agree with this. If you know in fact that you do not want a kid for whatever reason you as grown ass man need to take the necessary measures to prevent that from happening. I don't understand how knowing the fact that once your seed is out of you, you no longer have control of the outcome doesn't make more men guard their seed with their life.

I would agree with this if poking holes in condoms and lying about being on the pill is still a thing.

 

[AP3.0]

I would agree with this if poking holes in condoms and lying about being on the pill is still a thing.

I think this pov has also become a myth

Not acknowledging it doesn't happen in some cases, but let's keep it a buck. More often than not, a nigga will not exercise sound judgment and if a woman does not require the use of a jimmy hat, he's not gonna just volunteer to put one on

I say that to say, there is no need to poke holes in condoms with niggas who have no issue nutting inside a woman. Don't even try to pull out or anything (not saying this is 100% either), but just will openly buss in a chick.

And I don't think there is a large enough segment of women who lie about birth control either when most of them are very vocal about if they are on it or why they aren't because of health issues they experience because of taking it

TL;Dr... Stop promoting this is a thing.

 

[ZMaKEa]

I think this pov has also become a myth

Not acknowledging it doesn't happen in some cases, but let's keep it a buck. More often than not, a nigga will not exercise sound judgment and if a woman does not require the use of a jimmy hat, he's not gonna just volunteer to put one on

I say that to say, there is no need to poke holes in condoms with niggas who have no issue nutting inside a woman. Don't even try to pull out or anything (not saying this is 100% either), but just will openly buss in a chick.

And I don't think there is a large enough segment of women who lie about birth control either when most of them are very vocal about if they are on it or why they aren't because of health issues they experience because of taking it

TL;Dr... Stop promoting this is a thing.

Women are not gonna outwardly lie about if they are on birth control or not when in a long-term relationship.

That's mostly a subtle lie of omission.

You with a long-term girlfriend, she wants to lock it in, she knows you bussing in that thang because you "know" she's on birth control and then a baby happens. He loves the woman so he just goes with it or he regretfully goes with it because that's his consequence.

The truth about men is that a lot of men don't honestly consider fatherhood to be a deliberate independent option that is planned for. They think fatherhood is something that happens to them when they are with a woman. It's a consequence of sex. If it happens it, it happens.

Women think motherhood is a deliberate independent option because they have the various means to prevent it. Motherhood isn't a consequence of sex.

So unless you are one of those men that are family planners that is intentional with who he is courting, and trying to find a mother of his children, then you really ain't thinking about fatherhood in a serious way anyway.

You really just out here fucking and taking chances. Condoms break and birth control fails.

Unless you one of these men out here that want to be forever bachelors childfree motherfuckers that get snipped at 26 and never look back.

 

[AP3.0]

Women are not gonna outwardly lie about if they are on birth control or not when in a long-term relationship.

That's mostly a subtle lie of omission.

You with a long-term girlfriend, she wants to lock it in, she knows you bussing in that thang because you "know" she's on birth control and then a baby happens. He loves the woman so he just goes with it or he regretfully goes with it because that's his consequence.

The truth about men is that a lot of men don't honestly consider fatherhood to be a deliberate independent option that is planned for. They think fatherhood is something that happens to them when they are with a woman. It's a consequence of sex. If it happens it, it happens.

Women think motherhood is a deliberate independent option because they have the various means to prevent it. Motherhood isn't a consequence of sex.

So unless you are one of those men that are family planners that is intentional with who he is courting, and trying to find a mother of his children, then you really ain't thinking about fatherhood in a serious way anyway.

You really just out here fucking and taking chances. Condoms break and birth control fails.

Unless you one of these men out here that want to be forever bachelors childfree motherfuckers that get snipped at 26 and never look back.

I stopped after the first couple of sentences initially

I'll just base my pov from personal experience. When in a serious long term relationship, there are conversations between both parties in terms of children and even go as far as "hey, when we decide it's the right time, xyz has to happen"

IDK what men are out there in today's climate but again, if this is someone you are in a relationship with, why lie about being on bc when you simply can just go your separate ways and find someone who actually wants kids so there is no thought of deception??

I've also NEVER had a condom break. Not saying it hasn't happened but I've put some through some rigorous stress (from various brands) testing and still had plenty traction on it.

 

[Royal]

Update: Family member called me. The moms-to-be is going crazy. Apparently, she either wants the abortion or to carry the baby full term with ZERO doctor visits.

Duke is calling me, stressed the fuck out. He don't even wanna be with her anymore. He wants to to help her as best he can, but he says she's emotionally unstable to deal it. Don't even wanna be with her anymore.

Goddamn shame. ALL of this could've been avoided.

"Guard Your Seed!"

She may be wanting a doula..or more natural childbirth type situation.
When I got pregnant, I did have a moment. It was unplanned. I was at the MEPS (military station) in Jacksonville suppose to get my ship date. Was doing my last physical....

Came out Boo-hooing. But my bf was with me and he was like it's gonna be ok and he really helped calmed me down.

Now 4 months later, he was acting an ass and we broke up...never together again lol

But he could calm her down and help instead of maybe adding extra stress

 

[ZMaKEa]

I stopped after the first couple of sentences initially

I'll just base my pov from personal experience. When in a serious long term relationship, there are conversations between both parties in terms of children and even go as far as "hey, when we decide it's the right time, xyz has to happen"

IDK what men are out there in today's climate but again, if this is someone you are in a relationship with, why lie about being on bc when you simply can just go your separate ways and find someone who actually wants kids so there is no thought of deception??

I've also NEVER had a condom break. Not saying it hasn't happened but I've put some through some rigorous stress (from various brands) testing and still had plenty traction on it.

Yeah and people change their minds.

This mentality of, "Well we talked about it..."

Is how men in committed relationships end up with the surprise baby, where he got the suspicion that she wasn't tracking her cycle or taking the pill like she should but he ain't gonna talk about it and he gotta take it like a man and go about his duties as a parent because he love her or wants to give his kid the best life possible out of honor.

Seriously, elder men need to start telling the truth about the circumstances their sons and grandsons were born. There's a reason why Paul George married his stripper baby momma after questioning the paternity and being proven to be the father, he said fuck it, I ain't doing the baby momma thing.

For some women, if they find a man that has qualities they like and wants him to be the father of her kid, they ain't gonna let something like affirmative consent to parenthood get in the way of that. In a lot of women's mind, raw sex means you don't mind being a parent, it's implied consent.

Fatherhood as a consequence of sex is the framework that men operate in. We haven't separated sex from procreation the way women have had through technology and politics. We still using condoms and pulling out like they did in ancient times and shaming men into being dads when they don't want to.

Women ain't relying on a man's word to pull out or to put a condom on properly to prevent motherhood.