Head of the household.
FakeOhMars
MEH!
Nah. If you want to live a comfortable life we both going in.
My brother subscribes to this and stays in financial trouble while his wife keeps her whole check and blows it on dumb shit.
My brother subscribes to this and stays in financial trouble while his wife keeps her whole check and blows it on dumb shit.
Reading all that I thought it was 2 women, them niggas can get the FOH. A mortgage, gas,water, phone and electric bills will have one person broke as fuck.
Golden
Administrator
So proportional contribution?
I'm sick of all these damn rules. The husband is supposed to do this, the husband is supposed to do that. Everything don't work for everybody. If splitting the bills is what makes us work, then that's what it's going to be. It doesn't make him any less of a man.
Golden
Administrator
is his wife contributing in other ways, like primarily caring for kids (if any)?
FakeOhMars
MEH!
Golden
Administrator
If they care of the household (cooking, cleaning, etc) equally, and make similar income, then yes having one person carry all the financial burden doesn't make much sense to me.
If they had some kind of understanding where he contributes financially and she mainly handles the home, I don't see the issue with that arrangement.
Judge Dread
Active Member
Even proportional doesn't always work. There is no winning formula when it comes to modern day finances. Whatever works for the individuals. You just don't want one party to be broke and the other having a bunch of excess money. But I also don't believe in putting all of our money in one pool. I mean we file joint taxes so she knows the numbers but there is our account, her account, my account, her business account , my business accounts and our sons account and that doesn't include investment accounts. I pay the big bills and she pays the small bills. It works for us.
Head of the household is about the man with a vision for how his house will be governed. One of me like my mentors told me that as a man, if you don't have a vision prior to getting married, then you're not ready
The problem is us men marry, then try to get the vision which can create all kinds of issues especially if the woman doesn't buy into it
In ohmars example, if his brother and wife had an arrangement that his check pays the bills and her check covers the fun and discretionary spending then I don't see anything wrong with that but if she keeping all her check to herself, that's selfish af
The problem is us men marry, then try to get the vision which can create all kinds of issues especially if the woman doesn't buy into it
In ohmars example, if his brother and wife had an arrangement that his check pays the bills and her check covers the fun and discretionary spending then I don't see anything wrong with that but if she keeping all her check to herself, that's selfish af
Golden
Administrator
bingo.
Both parties need a vision prior to getting married imo. True partnership > one head of the household.
FakeOhMars
MEH!
Golden
Administrator
saying "if you're a housewife, the house better always be on point" is very similar to saying "if you work all day, you better be rich", knowing full well there are people working 12hrs a day who still live paycheck to paycheck. unrealistic.I do, when y'all struggling to keep afloat and she's like
I have no problem with house wives but only if you can afford it and the house better always be on point.
anyway, sorry to hear your bro's fam is struggling to stay afloat. that sounds like a bigger issue than lifestyle choices tho.
Judge Dread
Active Member
But I think as men and women we suffer from an identity crises in the house. I was raise by my grandparents and my grandmother never worked so she literally controlled the house and he worked 2 / 3 jobs. He didn't clean or do laundry and stuff. He did cook on the weekends. Now with both parties working all week the rolls aren't like that anymore. Both parties are expected to contribute in all areas. But if I was paying all the bills I might be a little uncomfortable splitting the house chores too. And if she is doing all the house chores she might be a little uncomfortable paying for things.
FakeOhMars
MEH!
This in a nutshell. And I'll add house money is house money no matter where it comes from.
If ya partner doesn't see the need to make sure the bills are paid before personal things then that's a problem.
Golden
Administrator
Bills can get paid and you can still live paycheck to paycheck, with no savings or discretionary spending money.
Expecting the house to be spotless at all times, when someone might have multiple kids that they're taking care of 24/7 primarily on their own, is an unrealistic expectation if you wouldn't hold the wage earning party to the same standard.
you're expecting perfection from one and the bare minimum from the other.
@ the unmentioned adding tags to my thread.
Get your own.
Get your own.