DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
same thing i say.....
gotta stop playing with people. you never know when someone will be having a bad day.
Bad Little Boy Goes Off on Cops & Store Security
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gotta stop playing with people. you never know when someone will be having a bad day.
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
you should make that thread.....
alot of people dont understand weak and whats weak,.
but then again ....why is toxic masculinity still promoted?
and why is shit like that still even a thing?
we cant promote shit then be mad at the monster it creates.
like you said...its a bigger picture.
My son stay acting out when I'm not around.
It's a daily struggle.
People who just assume it's the parents really just don't know.
I'm at that school so much is crazy. They call my phone 5-10 times a day. We have conferences. Action plans in place. He's seen 3 different therapists.
Like the shit not a game. A lot of kids you can just Jean on hard enough and they'll conform.
Some kids just don't give a fuck. They gonna do them. My son is one of them. I can 100% see him pulling shit like that
It's a daily struggle.
People who just assume it's the parents really just don't know.
I'm at that school so much is crazy. They call my phone 5-10 times a day. We have conferences. Action plans in place. He's seen 3 different therapists.
Like the shit not a game. A lot of kids you can just Jean on hard enough and they'll conform.
Some kids just don't give a fuck. They gonna do them. My son is one of them. I can 100% see him pulling shit like that
Like I don't think people really understand the conflict in raising black men.
As a father..... You instinctively raise your son to be strong, outspoken, confident, leader, strong willed, determined, aggressive
Then send him into a system that wants him to be passive, complacent, obedient, confirmed, like the fucking opposite...
They don't want strong black leaders....they kill those kids....
So we aggressively attack strong black outspoken men from the very start in fear that they will challenge the wrong authority and be executed as a result....
His teachers have said many times that initially he was right, but because he gets so worked up and refuses to calm down they are often incapable of properly addressing the problem due to his reaction....and that's one of his saving graces
He's highly intelligent...they need his test scores
His parents are very responsive....so they feel comfortable calling me vs sending him to the office
He doesn't go out starting shit, 90% of the time it's a reaction....
Every person I deal with understands that in his core he's a good kid.... But we also recognize he's a strong willed person in a world that would rather he not be....
I can see the 'protect him' nature of the people at the school who work with him..... But we also acknowledge that as a child, he's still immature in a lot of ways, and he has to figure out a way to control these emotions. So we can't save him from all consequences..... It's just fucking difficult
As a father..... You instinctively raise your son to be strong, outspoken, confident, leader, strong willed, determined, aggressive
Then send him into a system that wants him to be passive, complacent, obedient, confirmed, like the fucking opposite...
They don't want strong black leaders....they kill those kids....
So we aggressively attack strong black outspoken men from the very start in fear that they will challenge the wrong authority and be executed as a result....
His teachers have said many times that initially he was right, but because he gets so worked up and refuses to calm down they are often incapable of properly addressing the problem due to his reaction....and that's one of his saving graces
He's highly intelligent...they need his test scores
His parents are very responsive....so they feel comfortable calling me vs sending him to the office
He doesn't go out starting shit, 90% of the time it's a reaction....
Every person I deal with understands that in his core he's a good kid.... But we also recognize he's a strong willed person in a world that would rather he not be....
I can see the 'protect him' nature of the people at the school who work with him..... But we also acknowledge that as a child, he's still immature in a lot of ways, and he has to figure out a way to control these emotions. So we can't save him from all consequences..... It's just fucking difficult
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
good point. i think in your case he will straighten out. could just be a phase.
i can not see you being present and who you are an him to turn out bad. i cant see it.
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
very good post
I prolly ain't gonna talk too much more on this.... Cuz when it comes to kids, everybody an expert..and niggaz love coming at my neck about everything... But I figured I'd chime in.
But understand this ain't new for us. We been dealing with his behavior attentively for over 5 years. He's 8 now, so since he's been in school. Before school he showed no signs that he would be this much of a behavior issue. He says yes Ma'am and yess sir to adults when I'm around. L
Please and thank you. No talking back, or disrespect at all at home... He save all that shit for school.
We done took off work, sat in his class, seen therapist, had him psycho evaluated... Like we've gone through a lot...so it's not gonna be the simple fix that first pops into people's minds..... Cuz again.... We've exhausted a lot... so it's frustrating talking to people cuz EVERYBODY thinks it's a simple as
"Well... All you gotta do is....."
And I just get tired of that shit.... So I normally don't say much other than it's a daily struggle
But understand this ain't new for us. We been dealing with his behavior attentively for over 5 years. He's 8 now, so since he's been in school. Before school he showed no signs that he would be this much of a behavior issue. He says yes Ma'am and yess sir to adults when I'm around. L
Please and thank you. No talking back, or disrespect at all at home... He save all that shit for school.
We done took off work, sat in his class, seen therapist, had him psycho evaluated... Like we've gone through a lot...so it's not gonna be the simple fix that first pops into people's minds..... Cuz again.... We've exhausted a lot... so it's frustrating talking to people cuz EVERYBODY thinks it's a simple as
"Well... All you gotta do is....."
And I just get tired of that shit.... So I normally don't say much other than it's a daily struggle
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
i think alot of this comes from confusion.
being accepted
being black
not being a punk and gotta walk a certain way or talk a certain way or think a certain way.
are we encouraging our kids to just be who they are?
im trying to write a thread about dream killers.
its hella dream killers in our communities.
you kill enough dreams and we all become the same.
being accepted
being black
not being a punk and gotta walk a certain way or talk a certain way or think a certain way.
are we encouraging our kids to just be who they are?
im trying to write a thread about dream killers.
its hella dream killers in our communities.
you kill enough dreams and we all become the same.
The Mad Titan
Active Member
You hit the nail on the head when you said 90% of the time it's a reaction.
The reaction is what I see needs to be handled differently. Like I said early, we really got this whole going off = being strong mindset right now and that ain't it.
True strength and courage comes in your reaction to difficulty. I don't think anyone can call brother Malcom weak or docile, and you never heard him carry on in a certain way. He spoke his mind and stood by it without empty threats and drama.
That's one thing we a definitely getting wrong these days.
I'ma be that guy and say it, so many of us were raised by women, that we have inherited a lot of their emotional traits without having the opposite energy of a positive male to balance it out. The strongest, most G'd up, most leadership minded men are usually the ones who can control their emotions under pressure. That's a forgotten skillset in our community. Understandably so
Have you tried putting him in sports, help him work out some of that aggression.
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
just hold tight......it will get better.
Bruh.... He literally got ALL THE PRAISE in church for reading the accomplishments of Winton marsailas while holding my trumpet for black history month program.... Everybody clapping... Telling him how well he did. Encouraging him. You know... Positive reinforcement
Hi to school the next day he throwing a temper cuz he wasn't picked to read in class, and other kids laughed when he got mad about it....
Next thing you know shit flying across the class room, kids all worked up yelling in shit, desks getting flipped over, and my phone being ran....
What happened
They picked Ronnie to read and he laughed cuz I was mad.....
So the whole class had to pay?
Well they was all laughing.
Bruh..... This shit is stressful
Yup..... Our schedules just don't support it.
My wife is a teacher. She doesn't get home till after 5 most nights. And I'm often working out of DC,I have no set schedule. Every day it can be different
My cousin used to take him boxing/wrestling....
Went for like a month. No real change in school, and we took him when we were available.... But he was missing mad days.... Shit just ain't work out.
We're strongly considering moving to va.
She got mad cousins down there. They all play on the same football team and go to the same schools, and they got space down there we can move into....
So it might be a thing soon
But art is his shit. He draws very well, and there's a art after school program that he has shown tremendous growth in
He'll have literally the worst say in school, and then get student of the day in access art after school. He used to get into fights there too, but almost never now..... They stay trying to save his little ass too
"Oh I heard class was kinda rough..... But he's been AWESOME today.... So helpful, so pleasant, and did you see his sculpture??"
:word?:
He'll have literally the worst say in school, and then get student of the day in access art after school. He used to get into fights there too, but almost never now..... They stay trying to save his little ass too
"Oh I heard class was kinda rough..... But he's been AWESOME today.... So helpful, so pleasant, and did you see his sculpture??"
:word?:
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
i think we as men need to speak about our situations mores.
thats the only way we are going to get better.
none of us know it all.....and if someone does come with the all you gotta do is........they need to stf all the way up.
but its also about perspective......dont look at those who are offering advice as you dont want to hear it...look at those who dont say shit as more of a problem.
if it takes a village......lets be the village. anyone against black progression needs to be outted.
one day its your son...the next day its a man daughter. we all need each other to make this work.
ok im done for the day...
thats the only way we are going to get better.
none of us know it all.....and if someone does come with the all you gotta do is........they need to stf all the way up.
but its also about perspective......dont look at those who are offering advice as you dont want to hear it...look at those who dont say shit as more of a problem.
if it takes a village......lets be the village. anyone against black progression needs to be outted.
one day its your son...the next day its a man daughter. we all need each other to make this work.
ok im done for the day...
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
trust me ...i get it.
i raised a boy too.
but from this post ...sounds like they stopping him from shining or wanting to shine.
he trying to be great and they playing.
DMorgan
You niggas is EXCOMMUNICADO!!!
When peoples whole goal is just to survive in an oppressive system the concessions they make of themselves to do so they will never see them as living on their knees even though that is exactly what it is.
Well since I'm talking.....
Current situation
Reason being.....
One morning my son being the natural leader he is decides
"Hey guys.... Let's go to the gym an play basketball"
A reasonable child replies
"No Amir, we're not supposed to."
My son
"What? You scared? I'm going anyway"
So of course the other two kids follow him......
Little girls who live for this shit run to the assistant principal "Ms Lombardi, about Amir n them went to the gym"
Lombardi marches to the gym.... Orders all the kids to come to her.....
The two little boys..... Immediately run over to her... Cuz you know getting in trouble sucks...
But guess who ain't budging until they make their 10 shots.....
So now on mornings when I don't gotta be on the road at 6 fucking 30 I walk around to the school and hang out until he gets to class....
SeaSnake
OG
Bruh relax his threat was too police niggas in every state talk shot to police I’m sure y’all do in Detroit. You trying to put his shit talking to the cops in the same vein as talking shit to niggas on the street and we know it’s not. Why you assuming he would get buck with a random stranger on the street anyway. It’s not the same as police officer.
SeaSnake
OG
Where is all this respect the cops thing coming from? You think he spazzed on teachers or his parents? On one hand y’all say express self then other hand it’s act right and show no feelings because it’s the cops. And then y’all taking it further assuming he just gonna spazz on every authority figure.