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Am I Da A$$hole?

ImaInfluenza

ImaInfluenza

Who do you think you are? I am
Question for you guys. I have had a really tough year. I have a friend that’s the nearest thing you can call a best friend. She’s a very nice lady. She’s the total opposite of me and Infact I don’t even know why we are friends, really. I can’t remember how we became friends but we are.

So my friend is familiar with my tough times. She also is someone I have conversations with about shit I don’t tell others and about who I am and shit. She is real familiar with my past and how I view people in relation to me.

So, on my birthday when I woke up, I got messages from like 5 people that are near and dear to me to say happy birthday. For me, that’s all I wanted, I couldn’t ask for more. Just 5 people that have shown over the previous year that they are there for me.

This friend takes it upon herself to put in a group chat with over 50 people, to send me happy birthday messages. So I’m at home chilling any my phone is going bing bing bing, I look and it’s a bunch of happy birthday messages from numbers, most don’t even have names of who it’s from.

I immediately feel enraged, I get in contact with my friend cause I instinctively know, it’s no one but her that would do some shit like this. I hit her up and ask her if she told people to wish me happy birthday day. She said yea, I thought it would cheer you up.

I lost my shit, and yelled at her, asking what da fuck about me..the me you fucking know, that would lead you to believe that I would want you out here begging for well wishes on my behalf?

We had a big argument and ain’t talked since, am I the ass hole? If you know I am a very very intimate person, you know how I am when it comes to my pride and how I move. Why would you do some shit for me, that would be some shit that you would like to happen. I felt like she did that shit to say look what I did, and not with the intention of that shit meaning anything to me.
 
I’m completely fine with the outcome being that I’m the asshole, cause I don’t wanna be and I’ll apologize. Sometimes you need a more objective viewpoint. I was watching this



On the surface it looks like Jada is the asshole, but someone in the comments noted that the part that was left out was the Jada asked will for something small and he did this shit and invited celebs they barely knew and tracked down the ancestors of the people that own her family as slaves and made white dude apologize to Jada, and that’s why she said it was his ego feeding

that made me think, ok, so there are some people that think like I do. When I speak to family and friends they agreed with me, but they are partial to me, so I thought I’d ask y’all
 
Punctual And Organized said:
I’m completely fine with the outcome being that I’m the asshole, cause I don’t wanna be and I’ll apologize. Sometimes you need a more objective viewpoint. I was watching this



On the surface it looks like Jada is the asshole, but someone in the comments noted that the part that was left out was the Jada asked will for something small and he did this shit and invited celebs they barely knew and tracked down the ancestors of the people that own her family as slaves and made white dude apologize to Jada, and that’s why she said it was his ego feeding

that made me think, ok, so there are some people that think like I do. When I speak to family and friends they agreed with me, but they are partial to me, so I thought I’d ask y’all
Click to expand...

🙄😐
 
Yes.
Your monthly started and you were in a emotionally hormonal imbalance rage, for logic & reason were all but a distance memory, and thus this
But yay, they are back thus this thread
But take comfort brother, you are not the only one, many of us silently suffer with this
 
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Prolly, but let me have a quick smoke and read this
 
GNS said:
She's supposed to know better
If the thought of it was selfless then it's worth a conversation and to move on as it was b4
Playas fuck up
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a.mann said:
Yes.
Your monthly started and you were in a emotionally hormonal imbalance rage, for logic & reason were all but a distance memory, and thus this
But yay, they are back thus this thread
But take comfort brother, you are not the only one, many of us stuffer
Click to expand...
Yea I was emotional, and it was the fact that it wasn’t selfless that bothered me, like..on my own birthday you wanna make it about you. It’s one of those things that they say, what you dislike in others the most you dislike in yourself. It’s like my own hubris, and self centeredness on display and I didn’t like it. At this moment as of right now funny shit is it seems now like a lesson from god…huh

cant get this kind of perspective when you communicate with people that fuck wit you
 
Yeah. You the asshole.. Her intentions were well. Even if she didn't know you as well as she thought she did.... Being berated for it is a horrible way to treat a close friend.

There's a lot of ways you could have expressed that without being abrasive. But that's the path you chose, because you are an asshole who blows up on people close to them when you're upset.

She wasn't trying to hurt you. She was trying to uplift you. She made a mistake. It was an accident.

You were trying to hurt her. You meant to make her feel bad for what she did. You did that shit on purpose.


Yes. You are the asshole.

On the bright side though... Chicks love assholes... They assume most men are assholes, and she prolly was well aware you are one. So she'll get over it 🤷🏿‍♂️
 
Duwop said:
Yeah. You the asshole.. Her intentions were well. Even if she didn't know you as well as she thought she did.... Being berated for it is a horrible way to treat a close friend.

There's a lot of ways you could have expressed that without being abrasive. But that's the path you chose, because you are an asshole who blows up on people close to them when you're upset.

She wasn't trying to hurt you. She was trying to uplift you. She made a mistake. It was an accident.

You were trying to hurt her. You meant to make her feel bad for what she did. You did that shit on purpose.


Yes. You are the asshole.

On the bright side though... Chicks love assholes... They assume most men are assholes, and she prolly was well aware you are one. So she'll get over it 🤷🏿‍♂️
Click to expand...
I hear what you saying but I would like to state that I my intention was to express my anger, not to hurt her. I didn’t go into it thinking, ima make this bitch pay for this. I went into it thinking I’m correcting unacceptable behavior, like a parent would do to a child, spank them to teach them a lesson on how to act, but I don’t want to hurt them. I have a heavy hand when I lose my temper but I let it out measured like a tea kettle not like an open damn. I assumed my challenge would be met with a challenge and we’d squab it out, be mad a little and resolve. But all she did was cry
 
But you are right, as painful as it is for me to give her bail. She probably just didn’t know me like I thought she knew me
 
She fucked up, but you overreacted.

Yall gotta have a grown up convo, and as long as she genuinely understands where you coming from, you apologize for overreacting and yall move on.

If she still doesnt understand why what she did was wrong, you chuck it up to the game, and yall go your seperate ways.
 
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