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This Clip on Black Love Been Making the Rounds on IG. What Yall Think?

Duwop said:
yes

yes it is
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but it doesnt have to be tho.

you are allowing it to be hard.

just using you as an example....you de-escalate fights at your bar but you telling me you cant do the same coming home? is that sexy ass mrs du not worth it? is she not worth more than the local drunk nigga?

its not that hard....people should find other ways to de-compress before dealing with family
 
DOS_patos said:
so why cant she be responsible for just the milk?

do you go to work telling your boss you aint about the shit today because the wife gave you warm milk?
so why do it visa versa?

cause shes the easier target?
you want smoke?
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Yes she's the easier target and she takes money bosses at least compensate u for the shit u gotta take
 
Duwop said:
also, i ain't using white folk as a template... but white people don't be giving a fuck about their marriages either....

white men don't wan to be having shit to do with the kids, and make their women do EVERYTHING that has to deal with children..

they definitely be cheating like a motherfucker...they beat the shit outta their women, and even joke about the shit....

like the entire woman's rights movement was due to how misogynistic white men are towards their wives.....

black folk on the other hand we come from so many matriarch families that women are just respected more in our homes....so much that men often flee instead of challenging their strength....

it trickles down to the whole white women are more submissive stereotypes....


there's levels to all this shit
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it comes back to the imagery that shows black men in a bad light.
then for someone who is not understanding of the black man daily fight.....they will shit on him because the rest of the world is.
this is why we need women that understand the grand scheme...instead of jumping on the black man aint shit wagon.

think about it...
all a kid will see is a woman yelling at a man until he cries, walks away and gets up a slaps the shit out of her...either way its gonna have him looking weak.
is that respect?
why should a man have to fight for his position in the household when all angles are not taken into consideration. now some dudes are just aint shit...and they dont count here. im talking a man who is a stand up dude.
 
GrumpyOldGuy said:
I think during those times what she said was true. But i think it was the fact that men were constantly emasculated in public and were most vulnerable with those that they loved....and men werent so nice to women in the 60's & 70's. A lot of men were abusive, physically and emotionally.

But on the other side of what she was was saying, money and being a provider is the issue. Men in a lot of cases had to sacrfice their pride in order to keep a "good job" so they could provide. Fighting a constant internal battle when away from home, then having to deal with the normal peaks and valleys of a relationship is stressful. But to look at your spouse as just another stressor as opposed to your biggest support system is wild to me.

I say that to say both men and women, especially married black ones, need to come to an understanding of what our individual battles in this world actually are. We have to learn to be able to step outside of the self serving man/woman deep down wothin oursleves and be able to see the world from the eyes of our "better" half. I put better in quotes because we each come together in all our strengths and weaknesses. We have to be able to use those individual strenghts to help build and uplift our partners so until those weaknesses become null in void. Be supportive and patient with each other. When you find someone you love enough to want to take what is supposed to be a lifelong journey, it comes with ups and downs. We just have to have each others backs, end of story.
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You know bc you lived it firsthand. Such a wise, black Benjamin Button.
 
DOS_patos said:
but it doesnt have to be tho.

you are allowing it to be hard.

just using you as an example....you de-escalate fights at your bar but you telling me you cant do the same coming home? is that sexy ass mrs du not worth it? is she not worth more than the local drunk nigga?

its not that hard....people should find other ways to de-compress before dealing with family
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i also have a fucked up moral compass and smoke a lot of weed
 
DOS_patos said:
it comes back to the imagery that shows black men in a bad light.
then for someone who is not understanding of the black man daily fight.....they will shit on him because the rest of the world is.
this is why we need women that understand the grand scheme...instead of jumping on the black man aint shit wagon.

think about it...
all a kid will see is a woman yelling at a man until he cries, walks away and gets up a slaps the shit out of her...either way its gonna have him looking weak.
is that respect?
why should a man have to fight for his position in the household when all angles are not taken into consideration. now some dudes are just aint shit...and they dont count here. im talking a man who is a stand up dude.
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when we were back on the IC there was a discussion about hate. and i was in there trying to tell niggaz that hate will consume them if they let them.

it was one of those racial divide issues....i forget... but i was trying to warn niggaz to not let their hate get the best of them and the importance of god and religion and trying to be the better ma... cuz rthe reality is most people not gonna unleash their hate in a constructive way, but if it builds it will come out....

i used the working black man of the 40's 50's 60's 70's as an example....thy dealt with hate for 40 + weeks at the job, and could never act out on it once, or they would lose their jobs, their families, their lives..... but they still had it built up... so who did they eventually take it out on....

their families...

and as a result we're still fucked up generations later....
 
I get it, but I give as I expect to get. If my lady is mad, be mad. If shes in a mood, be in a mood. What you resist persist, I feel like real love is unconditional. I know we laugh at those memes, but if I can appreciate you at your worse, I dont deserve your best. And I believe that vice versa. If not, there will come a day where you aren't strong enough to tell that lie. Then all the things you lied about not bothering you, become too much to contain. One spark to that flame becomes a wildfire and things are said that you cant take back, and things are done that you cant undo.

The key to a long term relationship is being honest and communication. Not repression and denial.
 
PrecociousMorty said:
The key to a long term relationship is being honest and communication. Not repression and denial.
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this....

i'm very temperamental, but i talk about my emotions, and i encourage my wife to do the same...

and because we talk about our emotions, we both are able to see past a lot of the acting out we do when we're overwhelmed or upset....

it's impossible to not take your anger out on the person closest to you....

you can isolate yourself and not talk about your feelings to everyone else in the world, but not your spouse... and often they get way more than they bargained for..... but if you guys have built a strong foundation where you can vent, and later talk about shit... it goes a long way
 
Yeah man, as long as you both know and trust that what's said and done comes from a person that at their best would never want to hurt you. It's easier to get through them hurting you at their worst. Cause even then when they are in a better mind state, you can express that hurt to them, and they can accept that it did what it did to you. They will be less likely to hurt you knowingly.
 
i'm very deliberate with everything i say, so even at my most enraged, i ain't gonna say something i don't mean...

but i 100% understand what you mean
 
Crazy this topic came up....

And i had been watching this video...and after responding i got to this part.

Migga was spitting facts kellerman.


 
My moms told me some dope shit one day. She said "love isn't an emotion, love is an action", she said "we like to tie emotions to things that we do to selfishly to know how we feel" "but you can do some shit out of instinct with no emotions attached to it, and the recipient will feel loved"...
 
Duwop said:
this....

i'm very temperamental, but i talk about my emotions, and i encourage my wife to do the same...

and because we talk about our emotions, we both are able to see past a lot of the acting out we do when we're overwhelmed or upset....

it's impossible to not take your anger out on the person closest to you....

you can isolate yourself and not talk about your feelings to everyone else in the world, but not your spouse... and often they get way more than they bargained for..... but if you guys have built a strong foundation where you can vent, and later talk about shit... it goes a long way
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Another good post.
 
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