Kids decided I should try the Volcano Chicken noodles.
This sauce packet does not sit well with me.
Added the sauce to the noodles, it came out of the packet dark blood red with a strong ass smell of hot ass peppers. I took my first bite and it wasn't so bad, nothing I haven't had before, a bit of burn but that's about it, so I ate more.
Huge mistake.
The shit got exponentially hotter with each bite. This shit is un-fucking-believably hot. Shit had my lips on fire, my tongue and roof of my mouth felt like skin was coming off. The pain was unbearable. My nose ran like a water faucet and I was sweating like I ran a marathon through Death Valley in the summer. There's no chicken flavor to be had here, only intense chili heat. I don't even know why they tease you with this shit like you might taste something akin to chicken or chicken broth. Nope, just more chili. Since I'm lactose intolerant and out of lactaid pills, I grabbed the first thing I could reach, Coke. Now, normally this is a huge no-no. Coke and hot shit just don't mix, but this shit is SO hot the Coke actually helped to ease the pain.
Two cans of Coke later and I finished it, I have a sneaky suspicion that this shit ain't over though... It's gotta come out of my body at some point.
I'm trying the hot curry noodles with lunch tomorrow.