It's very hard for me to reject mentally unhealthy women in dating. They're like a drug. I have to do it if i want to find real love. When you drown in feelings for someone, you ignore red flags and signs that person is hurting you or will hurt you in the future. Unhealthy women might make you feel good now, but your feelings will disappear eventually and you'll see them for who they really are. It hurts rejecting them, but it'd hurt more breaking up with them later.
Rejecting unhealthy women
- Thread starter Isaiah990
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Cool.
mryounggun
OG
'When you're looking at someone through rose-colored glasses, all those red flags just look like flags.'
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
run....take it from me
Mr BFK
Active Member
generally that means you have to work on u and understand what value u bring to a relationship
when it's hard to say no to toxic people it's because u are looking to be validated by others
ur inability to decline what u know ultimately isn't for u, will make u just as toxic to the other person in the end............neither one of u will have reason for growth
people learn to adjust and grow when they get rejected for legit undesirable traits
but when u excuse the bullshit, that person never has to work on themselves cause people will keep giving them a pass
when it's hard to say no to toxic people it's because u are looking to be validated by others
ur inability to decline what u know ultimately isn't for u, will make u just as toxic to the other person in the end............neither one of u will have reason for growth
people learn to adjust and grow when they get rejected for legit undesirable traits
but when u excuse the bullshit, that person never has to work on themselves cause people will keep giving them a pass
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
i can vouch for this...
my bm said if you eat the box good ...you gonna make me crazy.
i thought it was sexy talk....i gobbled her ovaries the fuck up.
next thing i know that chick calling me to come over and then tell the cops im trying to break in.
dont do it bruh
Rubato
it only matters to us
Mafuzzychef
Active Member
Stop wearing condoms
those decisions start carrying a different weight
problem solved
those decisions start carrying a different weight
problem solved
Rubato
it only matters to us
Yea I debunked this also...
Black_Samson
OG
Sounds like predatory behavior and a good way to contract HSV 1-1000.
Well said. People will tell you who they are. I talked to 1 woman who said she couldn't stand affection from people, including her son. I was shocked. Sounds like someone with a traumatic past.
I agree with some things and disagree on others. I agree i have to work on myself and understand what value i bring to a relationship. I disagree with the validation part. Validation is part of being human. We all need validation because we're a social species.
I agree with the rest though.
Mr BFK
Active Member
nothing is wrong with wanting validation
the problem is what I said previously.......when u seek validation from others
when u are truly happy/comfortable with ur self...........u are less willing or have less of a need to put up with shit u know isn't good for u or makes u happy
this goes for men and women.......most times when someone tolerates bullshit that they knew from jump they didn't like
it's because they rely on validation from other people
Bobjones
Active Member
U should appreciate that ur self aware enough to recognize ur problem. That's the first step. Many don't and end up perpetuating their downward spiral to an unfortunate place.
As for the validation thing..
If someone seeks validation from toxic ppl there's always the risk of falling prey to and succumbing to their vices.
If u compel yourself to good people you'll establish stable social circles to draw worthwhile experiences from, including the good type of validation.
so, basically, tell those chicks to kick rocks. There's plenty of fish out there to satisfy your cravings without all the fuckery.
As for the validation thing..
If someone seeks validation from toxic ppl there's always the risk of falling prey to and succumbing to their vices.
If u compel yourself to good people you'll establish stable social circles to draw worthwhile experiences from, including the good type of validation.
so, basically, tell those chicks to kick rocks. There's plenty of fish out there to satisfy your cravings without all the fuckery.
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Very true. I made some progress rejecting or leaving toxic women.
The way i dealt with it was by challenging my beliefs on jealousy and love. I realized destructive jealousy isn't love. It's about control. Love is about trust, loyalty, honesty, etc. If your spouse lets you say go to a party knowing many women/men will be there to make you happy, it means he/she trusts you. That's love. If he/she constantly monitors you, questions your whereabouts, and gets very upset when he/she perceives dishonesty then it's not love. There's no trust much less honesty about the real issues bothering your partner.
It seems like in this society, people expect you to act on your attraction which is not always the best option. Attraction isn't a sign someone is a match for you. In fact, it's often a sign someone is wrong for you. Instant attraction is a projection of your unmet needs.
DOS_patos
Unverified Legion of Trill member
Yea.....jealousy was never an issue with me. Now if she starting to drop a dudes name too much....he’s in her mind for a reason. Time to move on. Once he has her mind it’s over.