Let’s talk Depression: Post Partum Depression & Everything Inbetween

[ImaInfluenza]

I think the safe thing for men to assume, as far as men that are aware of PPD. Is the assume that your girl has it. Take into consideration that when they are depressed, though appreciated, they wont really receive your attempts to boast their ego about their physical appearance.

You can go overtime dad and husband mode and be super helpful and super there for her, and theres a huge chance because of PPD,that she will just feel like you are smothering her, cause her agitation level is super high during that time period.

Best thing for a man to do..is assume she has it. Educate yourself on how best you can handle it as her partner, and go from there.

That's the part of pregnancy and relationships they don't advertise and I salute the women here that have been through it. I've seen it in live action, and my heart breaks for the women that endure it.

Your body and brain becomes your enemy but you have to use both at their peak to take care of a child. That's running a full court press all game on E

 

[Big Lurko]

When my wife passed unexpectedly in 2016 of course I was hurt but the depression didn't hit till a year after. I guess I didn't really grieve like I should have. Then to top it off I lost my job and was out of work 9mos. Lost a car to some bullshit. Then on top of that I'm now a single father who has a child dealing with losing his mom. 2017 was some bullshit.

In December 2017 I had to pick myself up and look at myself in the mirror and say what dafuck are you doing. Had to get my shit together and focus on my mental health and more importantly my son's. So I started looking at things different. Seeing what I really have and being thankful for what I have and haven't got. Reached out to those who tried to help me and let them in. Became a open book and stopped bottling up the bullshit that was bringing me down. I'll never go back to that person he was laughing on the outside and fronting yet a nigga was fucked up crying in the dark asking why me every night. I was legit a clown and even worst.... Weak. By the grace I'm good and highly blessed


Also realized I/we can't afford to give up. Once you change that mindset life is good.

Damn RIP, didnt know.

 

[Big Lurko]

I think the safe thing for men to assume, as far as men that are aware of PPD. Is the assume that your girl has it. Take into consideration that when they are depressed, though appreciated, they wont really receive your attempts to boast their ego about their physical appearance.

You can go overtime dad and husband mode and be super helpful and super there for her, and theres a huge chance because of PPD,that she will just feel like you are smothering her, cause her agitation level is super high during that time period.

Best thing for a man to do..is assume she has it. Educate yourself on how best you can handle it as her partner, and go from there.

That's the part of pregnancy and relationships they don't advertise and I salute the women here that have been through it. I've seen it in live action, and my heart breaks for the women that endure it.

Your body and brain becomes your enemy but you have to use both at their peak to take care of a child. That's running a full court press all game on E

This real shit

 

[DOS_patos]

thanks for making this thread meeky.

i dont know what post partrum is as a man or what it looks like. this thread is a lesson and thanks for speaking on it.

i need to be more supportive to women and more sensitive to how the ladies feel.

 

[Old Man Cain]

Damn RIP, didnt know.

Appreciate it bro. I spoke on it before in a @Goldie ?? interview thread

 

[BDP™️]

I actually was depressed before and during my deployment. Was having financial troubles, just had my baby boy and had to leave three weeks later. It got really bad when my grandfather passed while I was gone. I was able to go home...but I missed his funeral...it was all downhill from there. mine manifested in destructive behavior.

was drinking way too much. Partying all the time. And even stepped out on my lady. Just trying to find anything that made me feel good

everything came to a head in December of last year and I finally went to counseling...

still recovering and I have my days but im getting better.

 

[DOS_patos]

I actually was depressed before and during my deployment. Was having financial troubles, just had my baby boy and had to leave three weeks later. It got really bad when my grandfather passed while I was gone. I was able to go home...but I missed his funeral...it was all downhill from there. mine manifested in destructive behavior.

was drinking way too much. Partying all the time. And even stepped out on my lady. Just trying to find anything that made me feel good

everything came to a head in December of last year and I finally went to counseling...

still recovering and I have my days but im getting better.

glad things getting better for you lil big homie.

 

[Stomp Johnson]

I'm pretty sure that I had some form of undiagnosed depression between 2016 - early 2019. Definitely happier and more myself these days.

I just want to say I'm rooting for all of you mfs and I hope everybody finds their way.

 

[Chicity]

I promise it's not a shameless plug but I think we had a great conversation about Mental Health awareness in this week Pod. I appreciated @Alle'Oop, @Kandy, @Duwop, and @AP21 POV and experience . Again, super dope of @Meeks to get the convo rolling again. I feel like it's something that can't be discussed enough

 

[Chicity]

Bumped

I'm a scream in my pillow until my lungs sore

Good Night America

 

[Loquacious]

Bumped

I'm a scream in my pillow until my lungs sore

Good Night America

Knew the energy was off.

 

[Meeks]

What’s up? How are ya’ll doing lately?

A bit of an update. I’ve found a Black therapist who’s like the best right now. Spiritually she is exactly what I need in addition to everything else.

Anyone start therapy or try searching for a therapist lately? Any luck? Anything stopping you?

 

[Meeks]

Even more so, I am in such an amazing amazing AMAZING place mentally.

There has been a huge shift in my mental and emotional health. I think I’ve taken on a new way to grieve my grandfather’s death which has helped tremendously. How I show up for myself, how I process my feelings, how I set boundaries with people I love, when to take time for myself, etc.

 

[Young_Chitlin]

What’s up? How are ya’ll doing lately?

A bit of an update. I’ve found a Black therapist who’s like the best right now. Spiritually she is exactly what I need in addition to everything else.

Anyone start therapy or try searching for a therapist lately? Any luck? Anything stopping you?

Therapy is out of the budget at the moment, but will get on it once my money improves

 

[Meeks]

Therapy is out of the budget at the moment, but will get on it once my money improves

There are therapists who take on payment plans, bartering, etc. I’m down to look into options and help find therapists as well.

 

[Old Man Cain]

Even more so, I am in such an amazing amazing AMAZING place mentally.

There has been a huge shift in my mental and emotional health. I think I’ve taken on a new way to grieve my grandfather’s death which has helped tremendously. How I show up for myself, how I process my feelings, how I set boundaries with people I love, when to take time for myself, etc.

If you don't mind I ask what was brining you into depression? Also this thread has really got me thinking about going back to therapy and releasing this stress I deal with and not truly dealing with the death of my wife properly

 

[DOS_patos]

Ayana is an app that helps find black and Latino therapists.

 

[Meeks]

If you don't mind I ask what was brining you into depression? Also this thread has really got me thinking about going back to therapy and releasing this stress I deal with and not truly dealing with the death of my wife properly

After I had my daughter I had Post Partum Anxiety super bad but I also had PTSD. Anyway, I was working on myself but I was hitting a brick wall because I never went to therapy for the abuse I dealt with with my child’s father. So basically unresolved trauma, death of a grandparent who was basically like my other father, grief of suffering personal losses with pregnancy, stress from my full time job, every day life, being a mother and lacking focus on my individual self, unhealthy relationships, lack of boundaries and speaking up for myself which just lead to my abuser just further abusing me even from afar.

It sounds like a lot but even creating healthy boundaries mapped out ways to tackle some of the other things mentioned.

 

[25centsandwich]

Dont know if this is the right place for this...but how do you tell the difference between boredom and depression?

I've always thought that the things ive occupied myself with would make me happy...but what happens when those things no longer make you happy? Is that depression?

 

[Meeks]

Dont know if this is the right place for this...but how do you tell the difference between boredom and depression?

I've always thought that the things ive occupied myself with would make me happy...but what happens when those things no longer make you happy? Is that depression?

Well, if you’re already unhappy and you start searching for hobbies to take your mind off the unhappiness, eventually you will still have to address it. I tried that, I still ended up addressing the root of my feelings.

When you decide to do these things that normally make you happy, what are you trying to take your mind off of?