Welcome To aBlackWeb

Register

COMMUNITY Dumb sh*t said at work

Ok this mornings episode of “Tha Dumb and tha Idiotic w/Word”...

“Nicole” (39 yr old single mother of 2...formerly of tha “I heard they were shipping pythons in tha mail” fame): ***playing around and spills an entire mop bucket full of water 20 mins into tha shift...water everywhere and an empty mop bucket and dry mop in hand walking away*** “DAMNIT...sorry Word!! I’ll go getting summin’ to clean this up...”

Me: “You walking away wit’ what you need to clean it up Nicole...”

Nicole: “I was gonna go get a dry bucket tho..”

Me:
:huh2:

“Tha EMPTY bucket will work just as good as a DRY bucket Nicole...”
 
Revolver Ocelot said:
Slim you need to do an IQ test before you hire someone from now on.
Click to expand...

My people are really good at what they do...whether it’s welding, forming, machining or rolling material...just not so much wit tha day to day “common sense” stuff...I think I got a group of “idiot savants” TBH...
 
Word...Life said:
My people are really good at what they do...whether it’s welding, forming, machining or rolling material...just not so much wit tha day to day “common sense” stuff...I think I got a group of “idiot savants” TBH...
Click to expand...
I did matching in high school.
You use lathes or the CNC?
 
DOS_patos said:
I did matching in high school.
You use lathes or the CNC?
Click to expand...

We use both...I have 3 CNC operators and 3 Speed Lathe operators...tha lathes are actually run as “hand forming machines” and not a traditional lathe in terms of “cutting/making” tools...we do have a tool room that uses lathes to make tools but in my shop they’re actually “hand making” parts...almost like a wood worker or summin’....only we use different raw metals...aluminum, titanium, SS, copper, silver, etc etc...1 of my guys who happens to be a 63 yr old Korean cat is tha only person in North America currently making parts of our size...I’m in tha midst of training 4 operators for his replacement now...
 
Last edited:
Word...Life said:
These crazy muthafuckas that work for me are gonna own this thread...and not even about work shit just dumb shit said at work

Example 1 said earlier today by “Wally” to “Mell0” (tha names have been changed to protect tha idiotic)

Wally (52 yr old married comically country nigga who going thru a midlife crisis): Aye Mello...I got a FLESHLIGHT that I only used once...I don’t like how it feel...you wanna buy it?? I think I’m gonna just breakdown and buy a sexdoll and rent out a storage shed by my house to keep her at...

Mello (32 yr old Jehovah Witness self proclaimed cornball originally from NY): Nope...I can see if you was trying to give it away but who gonna buy summin like that used from somebody?!

Me:

:huh2:

I really hate both y’all niggaz and I wish I could fire y’all over this conversation smh
Click to expand...

Thats a whole hr violation lol
 
Word...Life said:
We use both...I have 3 CNC operators and 3 Speed Lathe operators...tha lathes are actually run as “hand forming machines” and not a traditional lathe in terms of “cutting/making” tools...we do have a tool room that uses lathes to make tools but in my shop they’re actually “hand making” parts...almost like a wood worker or summin’....only we use different raw metals, aluminum, titanium, as, copper, silver, etc etc...1 of my guys who happens to be a 63 yr old Korean cat is tha only person in North America currently making parts of our size...I’m in tha midst of training 4 operators for his replacement now...
Click to expand...
man i dont miss them days......all the fucking hot metal chips flying off and burning holes in my sweatsuits.
load ass band saws and my bit use to break all the fucking time.

shit when i look back....i did alot of different things.
 
DOS_patos said:
man i dont miss them days......all the fucking hot metal chips flying off and burning holes in my sweatsuits.
load ass band saws and my bit use to break all the fucking time.

shit when i look back....i did alot of different things.
Click to expand...

We’re actually one of tha safest companies in tha world fam...rarely get a 1st aid incident, won tha presidential or CEO safety award 10 years in a row and haven’t had a lost time injury in over 8 years...for this plant to look like tha final scene from a Final Destination movie they/we do a lot of work to make sure everybody leaves as safe as possible
 
I work in Afghanistan and pickup surveys that were completed by military members from survey boxes located within the Dining Facility (DFAC) on a weekly basis........some of the comments are corny and stupid and don't take into account that we are limited on food items due to us being in a war zone.....then to make it worse is some of the surveys have their name on it and they want to be contacted. I have to load them into the system regardless of the comments say because they are auditable documents. Some of the comments include:

The beef tacos were just a little bit better than the ones the Mexican cartel served me when I was kidnapped...please make them again

Yo......shorty that served chicken tenders during lunch today can get this dick

I stand with Brett Kavanaugh!

Where is the Diet Dr Pepper? This is my 4th survey asking for this......you guys don't respect the troops!

No espresso machine? I will complete a negative survey every week until one is available

The food is too salty /seasoned

The food needs more salt / seasoning
 
313 Wayz said:
I work in Afghanistan and pickup surveys that were completed by military members from survey boxes located within the Dining Facility (DFAC) on a weekly basis........some of the comments are corny and stupid and don't take into account that we are limited on food items due to us being in a war zone.....then to make it worse is some of the surveys have their name on it and they want to be contacted. I have to load them into the system regardless of the comments say because they are auditable documents. Some of the comments include:

The beef tacos were just a little bit better than the ones the Mexican cartel served me when I was kidnapped...please make them again

Yo......shorty that served chicken tenders during lunch today can get this dick
Click to expand...

LMAO!!!
 
1/2 said:
when I was working @ the gym this girl came in late for her shift and then says she's having a panic attack and asks if I can cover her

giphy.gif



when people walk up and start with: "Hey im not trying to be in your business but....."

y8Ea8jB.gif


"Hey I know this is a stupid question but....."

just-stop-gif-2.gif
Click to expand...
(((Lmao))) ok I see what this thread is really about
 
Motherfuckas somehow dont know the difference between a computer and a monitor

Got a ticket saying this lady computer wont turn on

i go check it out and she never turned on the monitor

i turn it on she goes o "well you didn't have to make me feel stupid"

i just turned around and left

we give out cell phones to the field workers and clinicians that work at the schools


this one broad had a flip phone and ran up on me saying she charged it all night but its dead

i pressed power button and guess what shit turned right on she turned pick and her coworkers where looking at her like she was a dummy

she goes " oh you got the magic touch"
 
ghostdenithegawd said:
Motherfuckas somehow dont know the difference between a computer and a monitor

Got a ticket saying this lady computer wont turn on

i go check it out and she never turned on the monitor

i turn it on she goes o "well you didn't have to make me feel stupid"

i just turned around and left

we give out cell phones to the field workers and clinicians that work at the schools


this one broad had a flip phone and ran up on me saying she charged it all night but its dead

i pressed power button and guess what shit turned right on she turned pick and her coworkers where looking at her like she was a dummy

she goes " oh you got the magic touch"
Click to expand...
moar!
 
Everyone asks where did I learn this stuff from and what school did I go to.

I hate them sneaky questions.

I tell them I learned it from YouTube.

Them dumbasses go and check it too.

They can't take that they got PhDs and I'm some nigga coming in making more than them.
 
one of the social workers wanted me to change her keyboard because the key symbols where rubbed off

i asked her is anything actually broken she said no

i was like na you gotta live with that she was tight
 
One of the supervisors wanted me to setup a workstation for her new hire but one of her employees had mad fucking condiments(sugar packets,ketchup,mustard,coffee mugs,etc ) in the area i'm supposed to install the computer in. i told her i ain't installing nothing until the condiments are gone

she sat there and look bewildered

people don't understand you have to make nice with IT WE RUN EVERYTHING YOU CANT DO SHIT WITHOUT US
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top