@BNE what are your thoughts on the topic?
I think it's unwise for all parties not to. By not telling, especially if you never intend to tell, you are in effect lying by omission because you're letting them run with the assumption that you are cisgender. Because most people are cisgender and that isn't an unreasonable assumption to make, if you haven't been informed otherwise.
How are you going to explain not having cycles? Not ejaculating semen? Dodging a fertility dr appointment when/if he or she wants to start a family biologically? Where wld it end? It's not a white lie that concerns no one else. It's lying by omission that wld lead to more weighty lies. Not a good foundation.
If anything, telling them ur trans early on is a good screening process. They could've spent that time being with someone who accepts every aspect of them, rather than keep it from them out of fear of being disqualified. You shouldn't want to be with people who wouldn't, given full disclosure, want to be with you.
The best a trans man or woman can hope 4 in lying by omission to someone they're dating about their birth sex, is that they'll understand y u lied. N even the best of people can have lingering resentment when deceit is revealed, especially if it leads into other lies.
I understand
@Race Jones's perspective, and theoretically I agree but I think it's idealistic. Does the need to know if someone fully transitioned was born a different sex have transphobic origins? Probably. But that doesn't negate an individual's right to not want to date or be with someone trans, even if the reasoning has arguably transphobic undertones.
Also, I don't think the safety argument has much of a role because we're not talking about telling every Tom dick and Harry. Yes, trans people have lost their lives due to people finding out and that can't be overlooked.
if you're dating someone and being physically intimate or having a future together is on the table, that is when they have a right to know.