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The realities of dating after 30...

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NoOneImportant

Member
At age 30 and beyond, are you still looking for the "one"?

Or, you settle for someone who is just "okay" because you are looking for a steady relationship?

By "okay", I mean someone who you had to convince yourself and others is great, but is really "okay".
 
No. this is depressing af. there's a world of shades of grey in between believing in only "the one" n thinking u have to settle.

u only get one life n there are too many great people out there to settle for someone u believe is just okay n have to convince urself is great just to not be alone. there r enough lost people as it is, dont encourage unsatisfying relationships
 
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Horticulture said:
No. this is depressing af. there's a world of shades of grey in between believing in only "the one" n thinking u have to settle.

u only get one life n there are too many great people out there to settle for someone u believe is just okay n have to convince urself is great just to not be alone. there r enough lost people as it is, dont encourage unsatisfying relationships
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Based on their current circumstances, people settle all the time on love.

Wanting security, own personal baggage, and being lonely are all reasons to settle for your not ideal person.
 
NoOneImportant said:
Based on their current circumstances, people settle on the time love.

Wanting security, own personal baggage, and being lonely are all reasons to settle for your not ideal person.
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you are right. not one of those reasons is healthy tho.

that codependency n need to be with anyone just to avoid being on ur own is a sign that something is wrong. 'Until you get comfortable with being alone, you'll never know if you're choosing someone out of love or loneliness.' it shows that they got a problem within they self.

there's a difference between accepting that no one is perfect n someone right for u might not tick every single box on ur list, vs. that example of settling just to be in a relationship. there's realism n there's oliver twist actin like oatmeal is gold.
 
Horticulture said:
you are right. not one of those reasons is healthy tho.

that codependency n need to be with anyone just to avoid being on ur own is a sign that something is wrong. 'Until you get comfortable with being alone, you'll never know if you're choosing someone out of love or loneliness.' it shows that they got a problem within they self.

there's a difference between accepting that no one is perfect n someone right for u might not tick every single box on ur list, vs. that example of settling just to be in a relationship. there's realism n there's oliver twist actin like oatmeal is gold.
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Do our egos ever let us get to that "No one is perfect" acceptance?

Most people think they deserve the best, when in reality, they don't.

Shit, I can name some people online that we all know who fits the preceding criteria.
 
NoOneImportant said:
Do our egos ever let us get to that "No one is perfect" acceptance?

Most people think they deserve the best, when in reality, they don't.

Shit, I can name some people online that we all know who fits the preceding criteria.
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good question. wish u wld make a thread on this.

most people do think they deserve the best but the reality is that no one is entitled to shit. the best doesn't mean perfection. i think even the best people i ever met, after enough time around them i noticed flaws. they're still great. just not perfect.

n if someone is never accepting that no one is perfect, they might find themselves attaining the creme of the crop n still be disappointed because that model chick with a sense of humor, PhD n penthouse apartment on the upper west side still leaves her dirty clothes all over the floor n nags too much.

n name names B. we in the mod forum, we safe hea! lol
 
by 30 you gotta stop worrying about shit like body count and kids.....

shit's just a dead issue at that point......

plus the best way to judge a woman is how she is with her kids......a woman can be fake with anyone else in the world...but they can't be fake with their kids.....

i guess the same is same for guys too....
 
NoOneImportant said:
At age 30 and beyond, are you still looking for the "one"?

Or, you settle for someone who is just "okay" because you are looking for a steady relationship?

By "okay", I mean someone who you had to convince yourself and others is great, but is really "okay".
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None of those really. Ive been finding the wrong ones so ima let the right one find me.
 
don't rush the idea of love. it will find you when ready.






Go picking and catch something you can't get rid of.
 
BaldHeadLogic said:
That's one of my concerns, being 30 and still trying to find someone smh
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Dupacalypse said:
don't rush yourself, 30 still young af....

it's not a race....
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Exactly.

Is there an official book stating you have to be settled down b4 age 30??

No...ok so you don't need to be in a hurry to do so. Enjoy life. Everything will come when it comes.

Last thing you wanna do is just settle b/c you following some bs societal rule that your life isn't complete w/o the spouse, kids, and picket fence.
 
InstagramusPrime360 said:
Again you gotta blame society. Society is the one that led women to believe they gotta be married wit kids at a certain age. If not, your life is a failure.
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It's true. Women have to listen to society and their bodies.

Miscarriages and stillborns are common in women, being 30+ increases your chance.

If they take a break from whoring in their 20s they wouldn't face these issues in abundance.
 
I ain't in no damn rush to find someone. I'm more of a "let it flow, let it happen" type of chick. My Mr. Right will find me eventually.
 
You gotta thank society for 'The One,' mindset women have.

You have to be delusional to think the right person for you is right in your city or on this planet.

Selling that dream to women makes it easier for guys like me.
 
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