this isnt my story, its my boys.
so we were at the club one night and my boy who drove to the club that night meets this chick and her roommate. were all choppin it up and whatnot all night til the club closes. theyre like you guys should come back to out place. my boy was tryna smash the chick, but the roommate was a tad...large, but im an ok wingman so im just runnin interference. we get to the house and the roommate is showin us around but the girl disappears. about 15 mins into the tour we get to the hallway by the bedrooms and see the chick layin down in her bed. my boy is like "man fuck this we out..shes in here bullshittin" the girl jumps up and convinces him not to leave and they go in the room and close the door. so im in the living room talkin to the roommate bein nice and shit. i wasnt tryna smash at. all. about 5 mins go by and i hear that bedroom door open, what sounds like running, and another door slam. i jump up to go be nosy and, hear my boy in the bathroom pukin his guts out. im outside the door talkin shit. hes cussin me out between pukin and heaving. he opens the door and hes like "lets roll...we out!" idk whats goin on yet but dont question it yet. glance in the room and the girl is layin on the bed lookin confused as shit. im tryna ask whats goin on and he says hell tell me in the car.
were in the car drivin off and im still kinda talkin shit about how that girl musta put it on him and whatnot. but hes like nope fuck all that. he goes
"tell me why that girl starts suckin my dick and it was arrright, but she asks if i have a condom and i say word. i get it and she turns around like she wants it from the back and maaaaan...i pull the draws down and it smelled like she took 6 shits, didnt wipe, then played 3 bball games! that smell came up and hit me in the nose with an uppercut. next thing i know everything i ever ate is comin up FAST"
so now im fkn DYING, and this dude is like hold up, where the hell is my wallet...i know i didnt...shit! he hits an uturn and heads back to the house. he gets out to go back in and i just have to go too. gets inside and the girl is still on the bed lookin confused. his wallet is wrapped up in the blanket. he grabs it doesnt say a word to the girl and walks back out. the roommate is tryna ask whats goin on, i can barely talk and my sides hurt so bad at this point. im like ask your girl.
we head out the next weekend and by now all of our boys heard the story and we see the chick out again. these mfs are callin her db(dirty booty) and doin post up moves and shit...the one who ended up hittin gives her a fist bump and keeps it movin.
