The Official 2022/2023 Football/Soccer Thread

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

 

[Blue_London]

I like all of them

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

I like all of them

They done a good job with these. Adidas have been on a good run with kits recently. Nike on the other hand don't even seem like they're trying anymore

 

[Infamous114]

Yikes

 

[Infamous114]

 

[toheeb27]

@thefrenchwood Hopefully he cooks under Tuchel….

 

[toheeb27]

@Blue_London @Nope i really hope he is back for the Real Madrid games. We have missed him so so much.

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

 

[Infamous114]

 

[DNB1]

So Bayern got Tuchel before Spurs could get him…

Naglesmann to Spurs?

 

[Infamous114]

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

Quote of the day​ "What used to be a decadent buffet with hot entrees and a cornucopia of desserts is now cold sandwiches and pre-packaged cookies." - According to an anonymous insider, the cost of living crisis has hit the Saudi-backed LIV golf tour.

FOOTBALL​ Everbody Knöz​

"Real Madrid C.F. wants to show its appreciation, admiration and affection for one of our great players", announced the Spanish supervillains after enigmatic midfielder Mesut Ozil retired this week. Real certainly owe Ozil a few kind words after their president Florentino Perez was caught spilling the beans about the German's sex life. In a secret recording, Perez told a business associate: Ozil came here aged 21. He is third generation Turk and then he discovers Madrid. He sent his girlfriend away and changed his lifestyle, falling for an Italian model from Milan. He had a private jet, so he would fly out there, fuck her and come back. Then one day, he annoyed Jose Mourinho, who jokingly said: "Hey Ozil, idiot, let me tell you something as if I were your father, because this girl you're going out with has fucked everyone at Inter and AC Milan, including the coaching staff of both teams." Ozil ended up leaving her.

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

FOOTBALL​ When you're done bringing the cones in, give the bogs a once over will you Gavi?​

Six months ago Gavi was on top of the world after securing a dream senior contract at Barcelona. The 18-year-old got a huge pay rise, the famous number six shirt worn by Xavi, and a girl even handed him her number at his signing ceremony (see clip above). Now a court has ripped that contract up because Barcelona filed the paperwork late, ruling that the midfielder must return give up his squad number and return to a youth deal that only lasts until the summer. After that he's a free agent. He can still play for Barca, but laying on a beautiful assist for Robert Lewandowski probably doesn't feel so glamorous when you're on £100 a week and you have to clean his boots with a toothbrush after the game.

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

FOOTBALL​ The Science Museum will make an excellent hospitality lounge​

Roman Abramovich knows a thing or two about buying cherished state assets on the cheap, so you can't blame him for trying to annex one of Britain's most celebrated landmarks into his football empire. After Chelsea owner Ken Bates sold the club to the Russian oligarch in 2003, the pair took a helicopter ride over London. According to a new podcast, as they flew over Regent's Park, Abramovich told Bates: "That looks like a good park. Let's buy that for the training ground." A Chelsea official politely informed Abramovich that would be difficult as the park was the property of the Queen, to which the Russian simply shrugged.

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

FOOTBALL​ Dug myself a right old hole​

As the press round on Alexander Mitrovic for light shoving a referee, there seems to be some collective amnesia about the way refs were treated in the good old days. That's if this email we received from Grant is anything to go by: Years ago, when I was supporting my favourite club Stop Out, near Wellington, New Zealand, one of the Stop Out players, Ken Dugdale, head-butted the referee, knocking him out (the referee - one John Perkins - was a bit of a tosser, but no excuses). Dugdale (pictured above, left) had to get special dispensation from FIFA, about 20 years later, because he became the New Zealand team manager, but was still banned for life from entering any football ground in the world. He's almost certainly still banned from playing, which is a good thing, given that he's 72 years old. Dugdale went on to manage a side called Football Kingz which is the sort of team name we can all enjoy. Although our favourite is still Japanese side Suzuka Points Getters...

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

Quick hits​

Premier League referee Andre Marriner was ordered to leave the touchline at an under 9s game after mouthing off at the ref. According to Peter Crouch, Andre Marriner asks people to call him Dre. Roman Abramovich originally tried and failed to buy Man United, and then Tottenham, but tight-fisted chairman Dan Levy wanted too much money. In the end, Abramovich offered £140 mil for Chelsea. 24 hours later, the deal was done. Chelsea paid Brighton a world record £21.5 million to release Graham Potter and his staff from their contracts. That's £2.7 million per win so far. Dele Alli has gone AWOL from Besiktas training. Barcelona Women's "C" team has scored 252 goals in 20 games without conceding once. Netherlands have sent five players home including Cody Gakpo, Sven Botman and Matthijs de Ligt after they ate a dodgy chicken curry on Wednesday.

 

[dontdiedontkillanyone]

AND FINALLY​ 75 years, man and Roy​

If you're wondering, the oldest Premier League manager who wasn't Roy Hodgson is former Newcastle gaffer Sir Bobby Robson, a spring chicken at just 71 years and 192 days. Palace fans will hope Roy is a little more engaged with the action than at the end of his Watford stint, when he didn't bother making any subs as he watched them get relegated from behind a pair of sunglasses.

 

[Valentinez A. Kaiser]

​ Quote of the day​ "What used to be a decadent buffet with hot entrees and a cornucopia of desserts is now cold sandwiches and pre-packaged cookies." - According to an anonymous insider, the cost of living crisis has hit the Saudi-backed LIV golf tour.

​ FOOTBALL​ Everbody Knöz​

​

​ "Real Madrid C.F. wants to show its appreciation, admiration and affection for one of our great players", announced the Spanish supervillains after enigmatic midfielder Mesut Ozil retired this week. Real certainly owe Ozil a few kind words after their president Florentino Perez was caught spilling the beans about the German's sex life. In a secret recording, Perez told a business associate:

Mourinho cold-blooded... But a real one for dropping them gems on Ozil!

 

[Valentinez A. Kaiser]

Apparently Folarin Balogun is talking to Team USA ...

Would make the most sense though for his international career.
Could be a superstar bigger than Freddy Adu!
Plus WC2026 gonna be hype if you're or