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Step Parent 2.

Loquacious

Loquacious

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Should a step parent have just as much say so as the biological parent when it comes to decision making regarding the child?

Example: When they can start dating, curfew times, and punishments.

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all stepparent/step kid dynamics arent equal. there r 1s who enter their lives really early n treat them the same as they wld their bio kids, there r 1s who arrive when the kid is old enough to decide whether they click with each other as ppl. some stepparents r just gonna be in the kids life in more of a "my father/mothers spouse" capacity than a parental role of their own.

if the stepparent has been there since the kid was little, has a family bond with the kid and is as invested in the child's wellbeing as much as they would if they were biologically related, of course they can have a vote.

only exception might be, for example, if the bio parent doesnt believe in physical punishments and the stepparent does. imo violence against kids should always be off the table but I think as a stepparent, even if u believe in it u shld stay away from beating ur stepkid.
 
Depends on when this parent came in and who house it is. If i come in your life at 16 i can only tell you so much but if you moved in with me you gotta rrspect the rules. Now if ive raised you since like 5 then a whole different dynamic
 
How can you ask someone to provide for your child in various ways and not expect them to have some decision making powers. You may be handicapping their ability to help raise the child if the child feels like they don't have to listen to them. But I can also see where a biological parent may want there to be some separation of authority.
 
as in rules of the house?

Absolutely without question. How a child lives in the adults house is 100% up to the adults who live there.
 
Few questions:

1. When does one became a step-parent? if you're dating someone with a kid(s) and the relationship is in a 8 month - 1. 5 year time frame, is that s/o a step-parent?
Does marriage make one become a step-parent?


2. If the s/o (step-parent) moves in with you, (in your spot), yall split the bills or you pay 60% of the bills, the mortgage or lease is still in your name, the biological parent is away and still somewhat parenting from his/her place. To answer the questions that the OP has posted.

What if the biological parent has said 18 years old to start dating, but the step-parent says otherwise,


Punishment for his kid(s) should be no TV, but the step-parent says otherwise, the step-parent (she or he) doesn't think getting C's and getting D's in school on the child's report card shouldn't be grounds for punishment because they got them shits.

The step-parent says the child's curfew can be 12 midnight but the biological parent wants the curfew to be 10 - 10:30 p.m.

Remember the step-parent or the s/o that you are seeing is living with you and putting groceries in the house.

What's the solution when the biological parent is like "that's not his/her home, he or she is living under you" and you are letting them make decisions for my child

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Those questions are irrelevant.

Once a person has made the declaration of step parent, they have assumed all roles,, responsibilities, authority and privileges as as biological parent.

If they are not ready for all that then they not ready I to be a step parent.

That shit not a game. Either you all the way on or you not.....

And a two parent home comes together to make decisions on discipline. If y'all disagree,, y'all work it out together. That's the job.

You can't pull that its not your kid shit once you a step parent. Cuz if that card gets pulled... ground for dismissal
 
If me and my wife split and she really was bout to marry nigga who wasn't tryna be there for my kids cuz they ain't his, I'd be much more worried than I would if she was marrying a dude who was going to treat my kids just like they his.

I don't understand folk who don't see the importance in these type things.

A step parent should be respected as a biological parent.
 
King Du said:
If me and my wife split and she really was bout to marry nigga who wasn't tryna be there for my kids cuz they ain't his, I'd be much more worried than I would if she was marrying a dude who was going to treat my kids just like they his.

I don't understand folk who don't see the importance in these type things.

A step parent should be respected as a biological parent.
Click to expand...


Using your example, you and your wifey split up.


She takes the kids and gets her a 4 bed-room home, meets a dude, now he's in her life a good 5 - 7 months. Your wifey decides to move dude in. (I know she wouldn't that, but let's say for the sake of this example)

Lil Jr makes bad grades, your wifey and dude is on that "he'll do better next time, don't worry about it lil buds" they don't punish him.

You get a hold of his report card and you're upset, how are you addressing the issue when both the mom and her new dude (step-parent) are on another wave than what you're on. Lil Jr is still on PS4 or whatever with a report card full of C's and D's
 
Idc when you come in my child's life unless he on his way out my house. If my new man coming in taking care of house and home making sure everything is good then he has say so in what goes down. It ain't no "this my child" bull.
 
Then the three of us need to sit down until the three of us come to an agreement on how we all gonna handle this.


She brought dude into the fold.... he gonna have to explain himself and pull his weight. These my kids. Ain't gonna be no half ass shit, and I'd get on her for being lazy with the discipline. And I'd get on him for allowing that shit to go down without stepping up...

I'd be pissed as shit at everybody, and they gonna hear it.

But I'd blame myself first for just hearing about it....

I mean knowing me,, I have no issues with my wife moving on,, or dude being a step parent. But I ain't going nowhere. They still my kids too.... so I mean we going to have to come to an understanding on how this all gonna work out.... cuz like I said.... I'm going nowhere
 
It's hard dating with a child. I've dated one guy and he came in trying to run shit. He barely had a relationship with my son for my son to respect it. Then he told me that I kiss my son too much and I need to stop. That was the end of that.
 
How do yall feel about dudes/chicks that come to the table as step-parents but they don't take care of their own kid(s) Lol

They do for your kid(s) but they don't do for their own.
 
Man breh, ppl want love and to be in a relationship, some don't consider those things.

aint shit niggas and anit shit women, they out here.
 
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