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Looking for new crew members *job posting inside*

And you’re the only doofy ass muhfucka still trying to bring it up, like it’s a real insult.

What happened, B? You still upset your puppet master chose King Dox over you? This ain’t healthy.
 
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Race Jones said:
Hello everyone,

As many of you have now learned, @Disanthrope was wounded in battle two days ago against the coon brigade headed by general tough feet @Mister B. and the modship fleet ‘95 headed by @Infamous114

this latest attack on my fellow soldier has left me in deep despair. I had no clue 2022 would start this way as I am now down a man and virtually naked in these Abw streets.

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I am now in need of two more people that are looking to join my crew. Qualifications are as follows:

1) No coonin of any sort. (If I even get a whiff of you coonin you will be disbarred and subsequently banned from all threads)

2) No mourning politicians nor white celebrities in public or on social media (unless its Betty white, Bob saget, Brittany Spears, Reba Mcentire, Dolly Parton and Jack Nicholson) those outside of this list should be mourned in private group chats outside of Abw

3) Must hate both democrats and republicans. No excuses. We dont say “Good morning” around here we say “Fuck the red, white and blue”

4) Must have an arsenal of verbal attacks ready to aim and fire at the opps at all time. I am not up here around the clock, I need to be sure you will be able to hold it down while I, your general, is away or busy with non Abw related task

and last but not least, you must be comfortable with being the Black sheep of Abw. This is a lonely fight, you will make many enemies and few friends but understand as your general you will never be alone and the fight for truth is far greater than sitting amongst scoundrels and thieves

If you feel this would be a position you would excel in. Please respond in my dm by end of business day

Until then. @Disanthrope you are forever in my heart as you recover from these salacious attacks. I am missing you comrade.

until we meet again,
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over and out.
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I read this in Dwight Schrute's voice. He would give this speech verbatim!
 
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