Are women too needy or do men neglect their duties?

[Reesey]

Debate in my whatsapp group.

Is it the woman's issue if the attention she is getting from her dude is not enough, or does the issue lie with the man not giving her the attention she needs and should it be on him to increase?

I know I am needy and get idle quickly. I like attention and when I don't get it, I get bratty and/or bug the heck out of him. Ask my E-King haha.

What say some of ya'll?

 

[Loquacious]

It's no right answer to this question because in some cases women are hella needy and in some cases women aren't.

I'm not a super big on attention. It's nice but I don't have to have it as much as a few women I know. I can say this though, when I really like a dude or when I was with my exes, I had my times when I was hella needy. It would be like little spurts here and there.

As far as the man, he gotta know what he's getting into. If he know he isn't big on showing attention then he needs to get with a chick who doesn't seek much attention.

 

[Reesey]

Is there a such thing as being with a needy person and compromising? It kinda sucks to think that you would need to leave someone that you are really feeling because they are a little too needy just to find someone else that is not that needy.

But the discussion I am in seems that is the way to go. lol.

 

[Duwop]

The needy ness....

Cuz unless your man never does anything with you it's mad inconsiderate of his personal time...

Like if your man is trying to relax, watch the game, play his video games.... And you choose that moment to be all up in his face.... That's not cool... Let him have his time,

 

[Old Man Cain]

Not really a black and white answer too be honest. Women can be needy creatures but if they're showed the proper attention you'll never hear a peep from them.

I'm someone who likes being needed so a needy female doesn't really bother me as long as she's not some whiny ass cry baby ass nigga. It's all about compromise and knowing whom you're with before going the relationship route with them

 

[Golden]

I like balance. If they're too needy or too aloof, it's a turn off. I think neediness is less a problem when people have hobbies and bonds outside of the relationship to distribute their energy to.

I don't like that the premise assumes a woman is by default needier.

 

[Reesey]

I like balance. If they're too needy or too aloof, it's a turn off. I think neediness is less a problem when people have hobbies and bonds outside of the relationship to distribute their energy to.

I don't like that the premise assumes a woman is by default needier.

Have you witnessed the male being the needier partner in your circle? Or is it about even.

 

[Loquacious]

Men can be needy as hell too.

I have friends who wanna be up under their men all day, everyday. Hug me. Kiss me. Talk to me. Do this with me. Do that with me. All damn day. Nah!

I need to miss my s/o. I can't be in your face all damn day.

 

[MissK]

I desire a lot of attention which is odd for an introvert. I'm not a baby about it tho. I understand lives are busy, so is mine but if I can make the time then so can he.
I have also realized that my need for that attention is deeply rooted in some events I have gone through in life

 

[Golden]

Have you witnessed the male being the needier partner in your circle? Or is it about even.

I know one married couple, the husband calls her no less than 3-5x when she's out on a ladies night out - which is only occasional. He's nice but I know that couple well n he's way too needy from what I've seen. He's an extreme example but not an exception.

I would guess it's about even.

 

[Whiskas]

I don't think there is any absolutely right or wrong to this question. It's all about compatibility.

But if a person is on the more extreme ends of the scale, they may find it harder to find someone who is compatible with them.

 

[AP3.0]

I'ma need to start seeing some checks for "it's not black and white"

 

[Reesey]

I'ma need to start seeing some checks for "it's not black and white"

Yeah, people are using that a whole lot more recently aren't they? I can see what they are saying though it does matter the situation.

But I am a brat and I will always be one, I just found someone that caters to that. haha.

 

[AP3.0]

Yeah, people are using that a whole lot more recently aren't they? I can see what they are saying though it does matter the situation.

But I am a brat and I will always be one, I just found someone that caters to that. haha.

Love the thread idea reesey cup

Gon respond when I get to a desktop

 

[BDP™️]

The needy ness....

Cuz unless your man never does anything with you it's mad inconsiderate of his personal time...

Like if your man is trying to relax, watch the game, play his video games.... And you choose that moment to be all up in his face.... That's not cool... Let him have his time,

I really hate this...Like you said very inconsiderate and I end up seeming like an asshole cause I want her to gtf away from me...im really big on my me time

 

[AP3.0]

no wonder i couldnt find this thread lol

im bout to move it to the relationship forum

to answer the question, i think a lot of women need to stop trying to make their man be them and instead of making him feel bad, you need to embrace the things that make you different.

Or appreciate other things that constitute as quality time. It cant only be quality time when ya'll go out to a fancy restaurant. What happened to just cuddling and netflixing it up on a cold day?

 

[Race Jones]

I know one married couple, the husband calls her no less than 3-5x when she's out on a ladies night out - which is only occasional. He's nice but I know that couple well n he's way too needy from what I've seen. He's an extreme example but not an exception.


I would guess it's about even.

That doesn't sound like hes "needy" to me.
That sounds like someone who is controlling.

 

[Race Jones]

I crave and desire a certain amount of attention from my mate.
If you cant provide that, YOU CAN BOUNCE. <<>>

like @Whiskas said, its about compatibility and I also agree with @BNE about needing balance.

I say get with the person that will satisfy you to some degree in all areas.
I don't have time or energy to "fix" you or complain because you aren't giving me what I need or want
...Because eventually Ill go looking for it in other places

I refuse to settle.

 

[Golden]

That doesn't sound like hes "needy" to me.
That sounds like someone who is controlling.

Word. It makes sense when u consider their past tho. His first wife left him after 15 yrs for another man, n his current wife is a free spirit who used to be known for 1 night stands with coworkers. He paranoid bout bein cuckholded again.

I refuse to settle.

I'm saying, settling is the root of dissatisfaction.

 

[Knock_Twice]

3-5 times..smh dude is bugging but kudos if thats what works for them. Being needy isn't an issue or anything, some women like the spotlight, but as a man, Ive learned the hard way, if you start off in the beginning of the situation Day 1 - Day 50 giving her your whole life and time and she accepts it and eats it up, and you know that's not your mojo, don't get upset when she expects you to do the same on Day 300-year 5 of the situation. etc.
Men don't neglect their duties IMO its just women expect if the man in the beginning of their situation, gave all his time to her/performed all of his duties in the beginning, she is continuesly seeking that action from the man IMO.
When dude falls back, then that's when the fire starts with both parties and you have these discussions which are healthy.
Just my opinion