2023/2024 Football/Soccer Thread ⚽️
- Thread starter Infamous114
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I honestly don't see what ramsdale or his pops got to complain about. This is football and specifically goalkeeping.
You should be used to disappointment from an early age towards making it professional.
Also let's not forget that the guy was playing and got relegated with 2 clubs in the Premier league before he got the willy wonka golden ticket of moving to Arsenal. Not only that, I'm sure he would have been satisfied with being number 2 there behind Leno...instead he done well and got the number 1 spot. Kudos!
Yet Martinez had to move on from Arsenal when he won arsenal the FA cup...that was harsh, all Rambo has done since being there is be the goalie for the team who went longest at the top of the Premier league and yet still bottled it! In other words, better goalies at arsenal have been treated worse...chill
Blue_London
OG
Ma femme is one the best ball carries in the women's game
Blue_London
OG
Real Madrid losing is this the secret group of death???
toheeb27
OG
Barcelona broke them???
dontdiedontkillanyone
Show some love, you losers!
Bit of a shit turnout for the Chelsea v Paris match. Do better Chelsea!
Blue_London
OG
Should have been at meadow
Blue_London
OG
I can see how this team beat arsenal
Blue_London
OG
Sam Kerr is the goat
Blue_London
OG
I can't believe I'm missing a Sam Kerr masterclass
dontdiedontkillanyone
Show some love, you losers!
Respect Kerr!
toheeb27
OG
Also a James Masterclass. Her assist to Kerr for the first goal was magnificent….
Blue_London
OG
We shall not address her miss
Young_Chitlin
Carajo 🇵🇪🧩
Not mad at all with Ferran, glad he's playing well at Barça.. we got Grealish, Doku, and even Foden on the wings. I think City will be okay
Blue_London
OG
I love it
dontdiedontkillanyone
Show some love, you losers!
dontdiedontkillanyone
Show some love, you losers!
dontdiedontkillanyone
Show some love, you losers!
Boobsmacked
Jimmy Bullard barred from the clubhouse
Quote of the day
“Winning against Brazil at the Maracanã in a World Cup qualifier is a porn” - Argentina’s Alexis MacAllister coins a new phrase.FOOTBALL
Jer want a flake with that?
Besides the exhausting demands of sexually satisfying two people, Jermaine Defoe’s new three-way relationship comes with another thankless task: keeping the arrangement out the papers.
In fact, the red tops have a proud history of busting the former Spurs striker for two-timing his girlfriends.
Back in 2007, the News of the World took time out from rifling through Charlotte Church’s bins to expose Defoe for “playing a game of two other halves”.
Describing Jermaine as “boobsmacked” because he liked big breasts, the kiss n’ tell story also contained this truly insane quote from his ex-girlfriend…
He used to have a nickname for his 'thing'. He wasn't very modest and always called it 'The Hulk'.
It was quite distinctive because he has a strange skin pigmentation down there -which means it's the colours of Neapolitan ice cream.
Scoop!
GOLF
Bad luck comes in trees
Tough day at the office for Joost Luiten, who reacted to a dodgy shot by throwing his prized driver in the air, only for it to get stuck in a tree.
He lost two more clubs trying to get it down before admitting defeat, booting his bag in frustration.
FOOTBALL
Bull in a China shop
When retired banter-merchant Jimmy Bullard coughed up the £100k joining fee for Sunningdale Golf Club, there were a few concerned glances in the clubhouse.
Sure, he had a handicap of one, but he also swanned around the hallowed course with a beer in hand, addressed the 90 year old club treasurer as “geeza” and pulled elderly members’ chairs away just before they sat down.
In the end, they decided to give Jimmy the benefit of the doubt, but he didn’t last long.
The former Wigan star revealed this week that he was kicked out of the exclusive club after playing 18 holes while using an open bottle of Peroni as a tee.
“I had a few drinks and I got carried away,” he explained. “I put a Peroni off the first tee and clipped a ball off it. I’m not allowed to go again”.
FOOTBALL
Flying fish
Ilkay Gundogan’s wife called Manchester’s restaurants “horrible…everything frozen”, while Angel di Maria’s other half complained: "The people are weird, the food is disgusting. It was a shithole”.
But none of those insults will hurt the proud people of Manchester like the news that golden boy Erling Haaland is airlifting in food to avoid the local grub.
Sick of the half-thawed scampi and Birdseye fish fingers in the Man City canteen, the striker is now flying in fresh Norwegian salmon from the icy fjords of his homeland.
“Haaland’s been banging on about the fish” explained a Man City insider. "He made the nutritionist arrange for the best fish restaurant in Norway to have their kitchen staff fly over.”
Hopefully the Manc nosh is the only thing Erling and Mrs Di Maria agree on - she also branded the locals “skinny and weird”, which is a bit rich when her husband looks like this…
FOOTBALL
You callous bastard
Nice “don’t make em like that no more” story from trained chiropodist Neil Warnock:
One day Derek Pavis, my chairman at Notts County, was getting on my nerves and I used to do his feet.
He had an ingrowing toenail and I could have done it out without hurting him, but I got the clippers right down the side and he screamed.
I said 'Derek, it might hurt a little bit but it'll be better for it'.
Quick hits
If Jim Ratcliffe takes over Man United, only one club he owns can play in the Champions League. He also owns French side Nice, and UEFA rules say whichever club achieves a higher league finish will get the European slot. Nice are currently second in Ligue 1.
The New Zealand basketball team are nicknamed the Tall Blacks.
Erling Haaland is paying for 200 fans of his boyhood club Bryne FK to attend their play-off semi final.
Mason Mount hasn’t scored or assisted a goal in the Premier League in 2023.AND FINALLY
You’ve got to fookin’ die for a sustainable approach to governance
Hats off to the Whitehall bureaucrat who snuck a reference to Neil Warnock’s famous “enjoy it, but enjoy it by being fookin’ disciplined” speech into the government white paper for a new football regulator.
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