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Double-standard on male sexuality

Isaiah990 said:
Shaming male virgins is a product of toxic masculinity and toxic beliefs of men can lead to sexual violence.
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i do agree there are deep rooted issues that lead to toxic beliefs/actions - isolating virgin shaming as if it was the main cause was the reach to me

the definition of being a man/masculinity already exists - problem is we live in an age where people like to redefine whats already been defined which results in confusion and abuse
 
aka_og said:
i do agree there are deep rooted issues that lead to toxic beliefs/actions - isolating virgin shaming as if it was the main cause was the reach to me

the definition of being a man/masculinity already exists - problem is we live in an age where people like to redefine whats already been defined which results in confusion and abuse
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The only people who have a problem with it are men who hold onto toxic ideals of masculinity. Why is it bad for men to cry or be vulnerable? Why is it wrong for men to not have sex?
 
Isaiah990 said:
It's hypocritical for people to call out male sex offenders, but shame male virgins or stay silent when they're ridiculed. When you promote stereotypes like male virgins can't get laid and still live in their mom's basement, you're contributing to sexual violence committed against women. Men are pressured to have sex as a rite of passage so they're gonna have sex by any means.
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There are double standards on male sexuality and I know some of this is cleared up better later in the thread but this initial argument isn't well thought out. Let me add that women are almost never looked at as sexual predators in any situation. I got family that refuses to leave their kids with other male family members cause "You don't know what would happen." As if, the aunt couldn't do some fuck shit when no one is looking.

I'll say is that male sexuality USED to be so strict that anything other than fucking bitches, wanting to fuck bitches, proving how many bitches you fucked was never a conversation back in the day. There were more ways to be called gay, fag, sissy, or punk than it was to just be a guy uninterested in sex. However, this was all peer pressure and shitty communication skills back in Middle and high school.

folks I associated with were mostly virgins and we all learned to just lie about it to avoid ridicule. There was still pressure to lose my virginity before college but it was more mental than external.
 
BrotherZ said:
There are double standards on male sexuality and I know some of this is cleared up better later in the thread but this initial argument isn't well thought out. Let me add that women are almost never looked at as sexual predators in any situation. I got family that refuses to leave their kids with other male family members cause "You don't know what would happen." As if, the aunt couldn't do some fuck shit when no one is looking.

I'll say is that male sexuality USED to be so strict that anything other than fucking bitches, wanting to fuck bitches, proving how many bitches you fucked was never a conversation back in the day. There were more ways to be called gay, fag, sissy, or punk than it was to just be a guy uninterested in sex. However, this was all peer pressure and shitty communication skills back in Middle and high school.

folks I associated with were mostly virgins and we all learned to just lie about it to avoid ridicule. There was still pressure to lose my virginity before college but it was more mental than external.
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While women can be sexual predators, we're not talking about them in this post. We're addressing toxic masculinity which is a huge problem because most sex offenders are men. We as men need to own up to it.

I noticed most of the people shaming male virgins are men. It's men who promote the idea you're less of a man for not having sex as soon as possible. They're the ones promoting unhealthy views on sex and relationships. That's a huge part in why men play with women's hearts in relationships. They give into the pressure to have sex because sex is seen as an achievement for men.
 
Isaiah990 said:
While women can be sexual predators, we're not talking about them in this post. We're addressing toxic masculinity which is a huge problem because most sex offenders are men. We as men need to own up to it.

I noticed most of the people shaming male virgins are men. It's men who promote the idea you're less of a man for not having sex as soon as possible. They're the ones promoting unhealthy views on sex and relationships. That's a huge part in why men play with women's hearts in relationships. They give into the pressure to have sex because sex is seen as an achievement for men.
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Feels like a stretch there fam. I'll give you that toxic masculinity is a contributing factor but peer pressure to have sex is a long way from encouragement to rape or molestation. Like yea, you could get teased about being a virgin but I never heard nor witness any dudes that were okay you blatantly bragging about raping a chick. Also, outside of high school, what dudes actively harass a guy they actually know for being a virgin? Who out here telling randos, "I'm a virgin and proud of it?"

Toxic masculinity is a lot of things but its peer pressure at the end of the day.

On top of that, when did the mention of double standards ever not include gender inequality?

I feel like there were good intentions for a solid convo here that seem mistranslated.
 
Isaiah990 said:
When have you seen a positive portrayal of a male virgin on TV? You can search online and find people bashing male virgins.
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In the most famous movie about a virgin, the 40 Year Old Virgin, the characters who shamed said virgin eventually changed their opinion and advised him to lose his virginity to someone special.

Then Steve Carrell got married before havin' sex and this was portrayed as the right thing to do

This is a disgustin' incel thread
 
BrotherZ said:
Feels like a stretch there fam. I'll give you that toxic masculinity is a contributing factor but peer pressure to have sex is a long way from encouragement to rape or molestation. Like yea, you could get teased about being a virgin but I never heard nor witness any dudes that were okay you blatantly bragging about raping a chick.
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Nothing could be further from the truth. All you have to do is look at statistics and see the numbers of men who engage in sexual violence due to toxic masculinity. Men even engage in other forms of rape like having sex with a drunk girl. They think it's ok. I hear tons of men who get their girlfriends pregnant only to leave. It becomes clear they only used them for sex.

https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics#:~...lcohol/drug facilitated completed penetration.

I've heard cases of male athletes like Brock Turner walk free after raping a girl. Rather than defend the victims, men defend him by saying he can't go to jail because "it would ruin his career and life." There's tons of men who victim-blame, minimize, deny, or stay silent when women get raped. They're basically saying its ok for men to rape women. When you promote the idea sex is an achievement for men, you turn women into trophies for men. Not only that, but you make it ok for women to rape men which is far from an achievement.

https://www.cnn.com/2016/06/06/us/sexual-assault-brock-turner-stanford/index.html

Also, outside of high school, what dudes actively harass a guy they actually know for being a virgin? Who out here telling randos, "I'm a virgin and proud of it?"
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It happens very often. I was harassed in school by male students for being a virgin. One of my male friends was also harassed for being a virgin. You can look at the mainstream media and see how virgins are depicted. I've heard of a gang who actively targets virgins.
 
Isaiah990 said:
Nothing could be further from the truth. All you have to do is look at statistics and see the numbers of men who engage in sexual violence due to toxic masculinity. Men even engage in other forms of rape like having sex with a drunk girl. They think it's ok. I hear tons of men who get their girlfriends pregnant only to leave. It becomes clear they only used them for sex.

https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics#:~:text=“Nearly 1 in 5 women,alcohol/drug facilitated completed penetration.

I've heard cases of male athletes like Brock Turner walk free after raping a girl. Rather than defend the victims, men defend him by saying he can't go to jail because "it would ruin his career and life." There's tons of men who victim-blame, minimize, deny, or stay silent when women get raped. They're basically saying its ok for men to rape women. When you promote the idea sex is an achievement for men, you turn women into trophies for men. Not only that, but you make it ok for women to rape men which is far from an achievement.

https://www.cnn.com/2016/06/06/us/sexual-assault-brock-turner-stanford/index.html



It happens very often. I was harassed in school by male students for being a virgin. One of my male friends was also harassed for being a virgin. You can look at the mainstream media and see how virgins are depicted. I've heard of a gang who actively targets virgins.
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probably going to regret even replying to this but here goes.

any statistic that asks the victimizer to explain their reason behind it should be marked with an Asterisk. there is just know what of verifying the answer as to WHY someone does a thing beyond the action itself. Sure some of them may say it was "toxic masculinity" but that could have interpreted from any number of responses.

As for the highschool bullying thing. Sorry you went through that but you also solidified my point that high school is a breeding ground for those types of behaviors. I specifically asked who OUTSIDE of highschool gets bullied for their virginity?

Sounds like life gave you some lemons and you haven't learned how to make lemonade from it yet. Stop looking at media as a source for your pain. Unless you have actively raped someone because you felt coerced by toxic masculinity, I don't see the point of defending this position.
 
BrotherZ said:
probably going to regret even replying to this but here goes.

any statistic that asks the victimizer to explain their reason behind it should be marked with an Asterisk. there is just know what of verifying the answer as to WHY someone does a thing beyond the action itself. Sure some of them may say it was "toxic masculinity" but that could have interpreted from any number of responses.

As for the highschool bullying thing. Sorry you went through that but you also solidified my point that high school is a breeding ground for those types of behaviors. I specifically asked who OUTSIDE of highschool gets bullied for their virginity?

Sounds like life gave you some lemons and you haven't learned how to make lemonade from it yet. Stop looking at media as a source for your pain. Unless you have actively raped someone because you felt coerced by toxic masculinity, I don't see the point of defending this position.
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The problem is toxic masculinity is the biggest reason why they committed their crimes. Sure, there's other factors like alcohol and drugs along with dysfunctional families. Overall, these are mostly by-products of toxic masculinity. It's usually men who use Alcoholism and drugs to cope with their problems because of the belief "men can't cry." Same with dysfunctional families. Fathers rape and abuse their families because of the toxic belief "men must be dominant."

To answer your question, i still get picked on for being a virgin. All you have to do is look at the trolls teasing me for being a virgin in my posts. Look at the virgins who get shamed on social media and in the mainstream media. This completely contradicts your claim that high school is a breeding ground for those behaviors.

When you say "stop looking at media as a source for your pain", you're basically asking me to ignore the facts and deny toxic masculinity is a major problem.
 
Isaiah990 said:
The problem is toxic masculinity is the biggest reason why they committed their crimes. Sure, there's other factors like alcohol and drugs along with dysfunctional families. Overall, these are mostly by-products of toxic masculinity. It's usually men who use Alcoholism and drugs to cope with their problems because of the belief "men can't cry." Same with dysfunctional families. Fathers rape and abuse their families because of the toxic belief "men must be dominant."

To answer your question, i still get picked on for being a virgin. All you have to do is look at the trolls teasing me for being a virgin in my posts. Look at the virgins who get shamed on social media and in the mainstream media. This completely contradicts your claim that high school is a breeding ground for those behaviors.

When you say "stop looking at media as a source for your pain", you're basically asking me to ignore the facts and deny toxic masculinity is a major problem.
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alright buddy I'mma head out with the rest of the crew. This sounds like more of a personal problem than a call out on double standards.
 
Isaiah990 said:
When have you seen a positive portrayal of a male virgin on TV? You can search online and find people bashing male virgins.
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Also, in the originator teen flick American Pie, the four main characters aren't losers. One of them is a jock. Three of the main characters lose their virginities to someone special to them, one ends up marryin' the girl.

And the Stiffler, the one who isn't a virgin, is portrayed as an arrogant dick.
 
BrotherZ said:
alright buddy I'mma head out with the rest of the crew. This sounds like more of a personal problem than a call out on double standards.
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Once again, you've ignored the facts presented because you don't want to admit toxic masculinity is a major problem among men.
 
Isaiah990 said:
The problem is toxic masculinity is the biggest reason why they committed their crimes. Sure, there's other factors like alcohol and drugs along with dysfunctional families. Overall, these are mostly by-products of toxic masculinity. It's usually men who use Alcoholism and drugs to cope with their problems because of the belief "men can't cry." Same with dysfunctional families. Fathers rape and abuse their families because of the toxic belief "men must be dominant."

To answer your question, i still get picked on for being a virgin. All you have to do is look at the trolls teasing me for being a virgin in my posts. Look at the virgins who get shamed on social media and in the mainstream media. This completely contradicts your claim that high school is a breeding ground for those behaviors.

When you say "stop looking at media as a source for your pain", you're basically asking me to ignore the facts and deny toxic masculinity is a major problem.
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The nerve of you to call anybody a troll

No one's "teasing" you for being a virgin...if anything you've been "teased" for being phucking weird

You did get put on blast for being a lying liar who lies, tho

Sitcho ass down somewhere
 
CeLLar-DooR said:
Also, in the originator teen flick American Pie, the four main characters aren't losers. One of them is a jock. Three of the main characters lose their virginities to someone special to them, one ends up marryin' the girl.

And the Stiffler, the one who isn't a virgin, is portrayed as an arrogant dick.
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That doesn't count as a positive portrayal. They're socially awkward and naïve about sex. Male virgins are not portrayed as strong, manly, or confident like people who had sex which is the problem. Plus, the whole film centers around them losing their virginity as a rite of passage. There's no film or show which simply allows them to be virgins without going on a quest to lose their virginities.
 
Isaiah990 said:
That doesn't count as a positive portrayal. They're socially awkward and naïve about sex. Male virgins are not portrayed as strong, manly, or confident like people who had sex which is the problem. Plus, the whole film centers around them losing their virginity as a rite of passage. There's no film or show which simply allows them to be virgins without going on a quest to lose their virginities.
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To most people bein' an adult virgin, especially if religion has nothin' to do with it, isn't a positive. For many it's banal and for others it's kinda weird but this fantasy you've got goin' on where male virgins are like easy targets is of your own makin'

How do people even kno' you're a virgin? I assume even the most waste of men I encounter have boned at least once
 
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