It's None of Your Business or Is It?

[Knock_Twice]

Merry Christmas to each and everyone you folks on this board.
Salute. We're closing out another wonderful year.

Listen here jack:

You and your s/o are at a cookout, shits in the backyard, it's 91 degrees outside, sun is setting but it's still hot as shit, your home boy/cousin or home girl/fake sister, wanted to have a fellowshipping outside in their backyard patio area to celebrate who the fuck knows, but anyway, they got the baseball game on the TV that nobody's watching or acting like they are watching it to not feel bored, and they have Alexa or a playlist music "old school shit" It's around 5:43 pm in the evening and it's about 25-45 folks outside, a nice gathering. The drinks are going, you're feeling good, your s/o (or your date) is a having a good time.

You get up and head for another drink and you see a chick or dude (if you're a woman, or dude who swings that way) that you use to kick it with about 2-3 years ago, there wasn't anything strong with yall, yall just took a few trips and smashed every other day or so, like adults. You and the person conversing over at the drink setup spot, your date or s/o is peeping out the action, but keepin it cool "or NOT"

You moozing yo ass back on over where your date is sitting or standing, you've spent 6-10 minutes over there cheesing and laughing with the old flang, Do you as a stand up guy or stand up woman, before asked, tell your s/o, or date what all took place over there, or do you go back over there and act like nothing happened?


If they asked, do you spill the beans about yall old situation or do you tell a white lie and say "Oh that was ole girl, that I went to college 15 years ago, she's my cousin ex"

Do you tell your business.

Also, flip the play, what if you was the one peeping the action, how would you react.

Those who are married, chime in as well.

Niggas who are half of a 100 with 10 good summers and 9 winters left, please provide your wisdom to this situation.


For entertainment purpose only

 

[Rubato]

6-10 minutes? Lol the old fling getting 45 seconds outta me tops, I’m not about to be keke’ing while under surveillance

 

[RusselWilsonJr]

Been on both sides of the situation and what I have learned is you have to understand where your partners maturity level is and where their heart is at, and where you presume to believe they think your heart is at.

When I was on the other side, because I was secure in who I was and who I believed them to be at the time. When they told me, I just thought it was a humble flex.

Like, yea, I used to get down, and I can still be an adult and cool. Cause I realize that for women. If she’s feeling a guy, you’d never know. Women can compartmentalize in a way that we can’t even understand. So it’s best to chose to trust and let it go and let shit play out.

When I was on talking to the old flame the side of this tale, I found that, women often know, not because of you, but because of the woman. They know the energy thats involved with a woman talking to an old flame they are still feeling and have already clocked it.

So if I’m honest about it, she can go through the litany of emotions involved with that and at least know at the very least, I kept it a buck. Now, I do know from that point on, ima hear a lot of, I saw ya girlfriend at so and so house, I saw ya boo thing at the salon, oh you going over there? Is ya wife gonna be there.

But that’s just her asserting dominance and dealing with her jealousy. But if she don’t do that, it mean she don’t care, and if she don’t care that you’re credible to other women, she don’t like you foreal

 

[Knock_Twice]

6-10 minutes? Lol the old fling getting 45 seconds outta me tops, I’m not about to be keke’ing while under surveillance

Good point, can't be laughing with the enemy.

What if the ex tries to have conversation? Do you ignore her or do you just chop it up wit her, cuz you know she may ask you "How you know such and such, or what you doing here when we were kicking, I couldn't get yo ass to get off the game, now you outside being social, umhp, ole girl must got you doing new things"

 

[Knock_Twice]

Been on both sides of the situation and what I have learned is you have to understand where your partners maturity level is and where their heart is at, and where you presume to believe they think your heart is at.

When I was on the other side, because I was secure in who I was and who I believed them to be at the time. When they told me, I just thought it was a humble flex.

Like, yea, I used to get down, and I can still be an adult and cool. Cause I realize that for women. If she’s feeling a guy, you’d never know. Women can compartmentalize in a way that we can’t even understand. So it’s best to chose to trust and let it go and let shit play out.

When I was on talking to the old flame the side of this tale, I found that, women often know, not because of you, but because of the woman. They know the energy thats involved with a woman talking to an old flame they are still feeling and have already clocked it.

So if I’m honest about it, she can go through the litany of emotions involved with that and at least know at the very least, I kept it a buck. Now, I do know from that point on, ima hear a lot of, I saw ya girlfriend at so and so house, I saw ya boo thing at the salon, oh you going over there? Is ya wife gonna be there.

But that’s just her asserting dominance and dealing with her jealousy. But if she don’t do that, it mean she don’t care, and if she don’t care that you’re credible to other women, she don’t like you foreal

I've heard that women can at time smell the past juices on you and your old flang that you had,

Is it wrong if you don't say anything about the situation if you're the dude who was laughing with the old flang and also is it a bit insecure on the dude's part if he's peeping his date, s/o, cracking the fuck up with her old flang, to ask, what's all the kee-keeing you were doing with bud with the brown sweater on at the mini bar?

 

[Duwop]

6-10 minutes? Lol the old fling getting 45 seconds outta me tops, I’m not about to be keke’ing while under surveillance

This, and 45 seconds is a stretch. I'm masterful with the hi & bye's.... Never catching me slipping like that.

Half hug

"Aye... Wassup... Yeah I'm just over here chillin
with the wife... You know how that go.... Well, take it easy"

Lol @ 6-8 minutes

 

[Koltrain]

6-8 minutes is way too long to let a woman's mind wander about wtf you doin over there cheezin it up... So I agree with the posts before me. Keep it to 60 seconds or so and head back to the wife.

 

[Knock_Twice]

This, and 45 seconds is a stretch. I'm masterful with the hi & bye's.... Never catching me slipping like that.

Half hug

"Aye... Wassup... Yeah I'm just over here chillin e
with the wife... You know how that go.... Well, take it easy"

Lol @ 6-8 minutes

Lol @half hug, the accuracy.

Say, Du, you married, what kind of advice would you give those who are in the presence of their exes or old flangs, we gotta alot of folks on this board who be moving like this in reality, and may need help in that department, let these jacks know how not to have that ride home from the shindig, car ride in silence


Nigga be riding in car, "aye you aight, why you so quiet" ass niggas

 

[Knock_Twice]

6-8 minutes is way too long to let a woman's mind wander about wtf you doin over there cheezin it up... So I agree with the posts before me. Keep it to 60 seconds or so and head back to the wife.

What happens if your s/o takes longer than the allotted time that's set in the situation, or better yet, if your date brought you there to her friend's shindig, you're the new dude, you don't know anybody, but she knows most.

You just been kicking shit wit her for about 3 weeks to a month, and this is her folks, you're her date,

Do you time her convos? or do you just sit there and play it cool like a g with all her interactions?

 

[Loquacious]

there wasn't anything strong with yall, yall just took a few trips and smashed every other day or so,

Ain’t finished reading yet but

 

[Loquacious]

you've spent 6-10 minutes over there cheesing and laughing with the old flang,

 

[Duwop]

Oh and full transparency too....

" Man, I ain't think she would be here... Went on a trip with shorty a few years back, but that shit was NOT gonna work out. Nice person though."

Always be respectful, but make it clear there's no lingering interest.

 

[Loquacious]

Don’t even come and talk to me after those 6-10 minutes. I’m hopping in the car and dipping.

 

[Knock_Twice]

Ain’t finished reading yet but

Unpack this red flag,
Why in your heart, do you consider this as a red flag?

 

[Loquacious]

Unpack this red flag,
Why in your heart, do you consider this as a red flag?

You smashing and going on trips. That’s something.

 

[Knock_Twice]

Oh and full transparency too....

" Man, I ain't think she would be here... Went on a trip with shorty a few years back, but that shit was NOT gonna work out. Nice person though."

Always be respectful, but make it clear there's no lingering interest.

I agree.

Flip it, what if you're at your date's folks setup, you're the dude that nobody knows, do you question her if she's been kee-keeing? I asked the poster who made the post #6 this question.

 

[Knock_Twice]

You smashing and going on trips. That’s something.

Fun right, better yet, enjoying each others company?


What would you call it?

 

[Duwop]

What happens if your s/o takes longer than the allotted time that's set in the situation, or better yet, if your date brought you there to her friend's shindig, you're the new dude, you don't know anybody, but she knows most.

You just been kicking shit wit her for about 3 weeks to a month, and this is her folks, you're her date,

Do you time her convos? or do you just sit there and play it cool like a g with all her interactions?

Like I was saying in the previous post.

Just say the person was nice enough, y'all just wasn't a match. Make it relatable
Everybody knows what its like to meet someone who's a cool person, but they didnt share any real chemistry. You ain't gotta tell her how many times y'all went on trips or fucked... But if the chick is cute, your girl can CLEARLY see that... So just lean in to that.

"Yeah, she was cute, I thought it might be worth pursuing, we just didn't really connect like that. Figured it was best to keep it moving instead of wasting each other's time"

 

[Loquacious]

Fun right, better yet, enjoying each others company?


What would you call it?

Feelings

 

[Duwop]

I agree.

Flip it, what if you're at your date's folks setup, you're the dude that nobody knows, do you question her if she's been kee-keeing? I asked the poster who made the post #6 this question.

Oh I don't give a fuck. I'm very good at entertaining myself. In fact if I saw her really into a conversation I'm dipping off to go smoke somewhere by myself.