How much emotional labor do you do in a relationship?

[deadeye]

Do you even know what emotional labor is?

Basically, it's being a sounding board to your s/o and taking on the burdens of all of her problems without even realizing it.

Example?

Her telling you about her day and talking about it for hours on end with little to no input from you at all.

There's a livestream on youtube about it right now:

 

[PlantainChips]

Do you even know what emotional labor is?

Basically, it's being a sounding board to your s/o and taking on the burdens of all of her problems without even realizing it.

Example?

Her telling you about her day and talking about it for hours on end with little to no input from you at all.

There's a livestream on youtube about it right now:

Or men can learn to stop dating women who don’t know how to take care of themselves emotionally. I mean is it that rare? I hear men complaining about it all the time.

 

[deadeye]

Or men can learn to stop dating women who don’t know how to take care of themselves emotionally. I mean is it that rare? I hear men complaining about it all the time.

It's a little more to it than that.


Basically, woman don't even realize they're doing it..........and, subsequently, don't value the emotional labor we provide them.

 

[PlantainChips]

It's a little more to it than that.


Basically, woman don't even realize they're doing it..........and, subsequently, don't value the emotional labor we provide them.

Yea. But that’s my point. It means men are out here dating emotionally unintelligent and unaware women. They are the type of women who act like this.

 

[Golan]

I did it a lot towards the end of my last relationship.

 

[deadeye]

I did it a lot towards the end of my last relationship.

How much of a toll did it take on you?


And do you think that contributed to the end of the relationship?


Meaning, was the emotional labor so much that you had to walk away for the sake of your own mental well-being?

 

[Eartha Clit]

I think I do a lot because I’m naturally caring. It gets on my nerves when the problem never has a solution.

 

[mryounggun]

A lot. A whole lot. So much so that it became and issue. Shit is exhausting.

 

[DOPE33]

A lot. A whole lot. So much so that it became and issue. Shit is exhausting.

This.. it became way to much until her shit consumed me too.. She was literally a black cloud

 

[Eartha Clit]

This.. it became way to much until her shit consumed me too.. She was literally a black cloud

I’ve been there!!! Ended the relationship

 

[dodge]

What’s worse isn’t just dealing with this in romantic relationships

But also when you have to cut off family and friends as well because they do the same thing

 

[IP360]

My ex would probably be the perfect example of this. I'd call her on my breaks, and this hefa literally took the bulk of my break time ranting. It's when my break is nearly where she'd catch herself, and realized she hasn't ask me how's work going. At least she'd apologized tho.

Currently...not really an issue. I think I've been good wit settin a limit on myself about the gossipy she likes to talk about. After a few minutes if it goes overboard, I'd just cut her off wit the "Aiight now that's enuff of that. I dont wanna hear no more" response.

I may get cursed at. Stared at. Flipped off. But the shyt ends regardless. I mean I get wanting to rant, but then you gotta be cognizant of how much of that shyt you're dumping on them.

 

[SeaSnake]

Hmmmmm I’m very caring and want to help with the issue if it’s something that’s legit an issue. But I don’t really let the conversation be one sided. My issue is I don’t really check when my friend is wrong unless it’s blatant. And I need to stop that. End up co-signing their bullshit or they co-sign mine

 

[dodge]

Over the years I’ve noticed that certain friends (that I would eventually cut off) would always “rant or gossip” about what their other “friends” were doing…or they would try to argue about silly shit like their taste in music or movies and when I would show a lack of care, disagreement or nonchalance they would take it personally as if I’m belittling their character

One dude I was trying to work with randomly was gossiping about people he knew….I literally just shrugged it off because it was petty to me….he ran the other way and yelled “You’ll never be better than me!”….I laughed and shook my head like wtf just happened

I cut people like that off…whether girls I dealt with or particular friends…..but I would blame myself more because maybe I invite that type of energy too easily

 

[Duwop]

It can be a lot. Weed helps