"Hey, Son. Dad here. Sorry about the deadbeat, no child support vibe I've been giving off for the past two years. Sorry about killing you on a private jet. I probably could have waited till you crossed the GW, but no, your vampire birth certificate resides in fսck¡ng Newark. Oh, and one more thing, you're not gonna get any of my special vamp skills because my blood sucks. And oh, by the way, I'm a friendless bottom twink sociopath. Sorry about Dubai. Sorry about San Francisco. And hey, a big-time sorry about every second in your life in between... the two divorces, the blackout years at Knight Ridder, the five trips to rehab, the year listening to Phish. Yeah, that's all on me. But hey, boyo, you have to admit that it really does all boomerang 'round at Castro Street and your weekend at Mengele's, doesn't it? I'm really sorry about that, Danny. It was my job to put you out of your misery. But, hey, when a bucket of Louisiana fried chicken walks into the room and says, 'Stop, ' well, what can I say? I'm just a 500-year-old pussy. Oops!"
Man Daniel is fucking hilarious I don’t want him to die.