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Is being a lifelong bachelor worth it??

Might-Guy

Might-Guy

New Member
Been thinking about this for awhile now.

I'm currently doing whatever it takes to become financially stable within the next few years. I've recently noticed that most of the college educated and financially stable black men around me currently are either married or in long term relationships. Major reason for this is because I'm from the suburbs and most niggas around me are usually marriage minded.



It seems like after 40 most men become sugar daddies if they decide to date younger chicks(early to mid 20s) This lifestyle also looks a bit lonely from the outside.

Do most of these lifelong bachelors try to build a community similar to single women? The bachelor lifestyle would look a lot more fun if niggas spoke about building long term friendships, instead of just always talking about fucking a bunch of hoes.

Dying alone in a retirement home with no one around that actually cares about you seems depressing tbh.
 
Men are solitary creatures.

A man is supposed to create his own life through his strength and guile and build his own little fiefdom.

I am an old man that has been a bachelor for most of my life.

You don't create lifelong bonds. Bachelorhood means you are free to do as you please and go wherever you want to go.

It's a life of zero attachments. Your male friends will most likely marry or become attached and spend time building their life with their loved ones. Your lovers will leave you high and dry because they are tired of wasting their time.

Eternal bachelorhood is unnatural and not beneficial. Nobody will take you seriously as a single man over the age of 40 without any kids or long term relationships if you are interested in social climbing. Marriage and kids signals stability and maturity. It means you are invested in the next generation.

People will envy your bachelor life but everyone deep down understands that relationships and attachments are the fruits of life. Doing whatever you want, whenever you want is a power fantasty that most people don't want to experience because it is lonely.

I haven't dated a woman my age since my late 30s. I haven't been in a serious relationship since I was 29. I have been very poor in my youth to being well off.

If I had a wife and kid, I probably would still be working and a happier man. But I also wouldn't be able to live the lifestyle I have had for the past 20 years. When I die, I will have no inheritators. The worst thing that happened to me since my mature adulthood is ball cancer.

My soul is around here somewhere but I can't seem to find it. I probably forgot I sold it a long time ago.

Find a wife. Find a community of families to mesh with and build a real life. Fucking on OF girls and funding college degrees with your IT money is lame. Hanging out with a bunch of middle aged single men is lame.
 
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ZMaKEa said:
Men are solitary creatures.

A man is supposed to create his own life through his strength and guild and build his own little fiefdom.

I am an old man that has been a bachelor for most of my life.

You don't create lifelong bonds. Bachelorhood means you are free to do as you please and go wherever you want to go.

It's a life of zero attachments. Your male friends will most likely marry or become attached and spend time building their life with their loved ones. Your lovers will leave you high and dry because they are tired of wasting their time.

Eternal bachelorhood is unnatural and not beneficial. Nobody will take you seriously as a single man over the age of 40 without any kids or long term relationships if you are interested in social climbing. Marriage and kids signals stability and maturity. It means you are invested in the next generation.

People will envy your bachelor life but everyone deep down understands that relationships and attachments are the fruits of life. Doing whatever you want, whenever you want is a power fantasty that most people don't want to experience because it is lonely.

I haven't dated a woman my age since my late 30s. I haven't been in a serious relationship since I was 29. I have been very poor in my youth to being well off.

If I had a wife and kid, I probably would still be working and a happier man. But I also wouldn't be able to live the lifestyle I have had for the past 20 years. When I die, I will have no inheritators. The worst thing that happened to me since my mature adulthood is ball cancer.

My soul is around here somewhere but I can't seem to find it. I probably forgot I sold it a long time ago.

Find a wife. Find a community of families to mesh with and build a real life. Fucking on OF girls and funding college degrees with your IT money is lame. Hanging out with a bunch of middle aged single men is lame.
Click to expand...

"Find a wife. Find a community of families to mesh with and build a real life. Fucking on OF girls and funding college degrees with your IT money is lame. Hanging out with a bunch of middle aged single men is lame."

That's my goal currently. Trying to settle down with a fine ass childfree baddie by the time im 35.

Not trying to end up like this

 
Might-Guy said:
"Find a wife. Find a community of families to mesh with and build a real life. Fucking on OF girls and funding college degrees with your IT money is lame. Hanging out with a bunch of middle aged single men is lame."

That's my goal currently. Trying to settle down with a fine ass childfree baddie by the time im 35.

Not trying to end up like this

Click to expand...


yoooooooooooooooooo!!! this nigga forreal broke down over an internet smut???


This can't be real life.
 
ZMaKEa said:
Men are solitary creatures.

A man is supposed to create his own life through his strength and guild and build his own little fiefdom.

I am an old man that has been a bachelor for most of my life.

You don't create lifelong bonds. Bachelorhood means you are free to do as you please and go wherever you want to go.

It's a life of zero attachments. Your male friends will most likely marry or become attached and spend time building their life with their loved ones. Your lovers will leave you high and dry because they are tired of wasting their time.

Eternal bachelorhood is unnatural and not beneficial. Nobody will take you seriously as a single man over the age of 40 without any kids or long term relationships if you are interested in social climbing. Marriage and kids signals stability and maturity. It means you are invested in the next generation.

People will envy your bachelor life but everyone deep down understands that relationships and attachments are the fruits of life. Doing whatever you want, whenever you want is a power fantasty that most people don't want to experience because it is lonely.

I haven't dated a woman my age since my late 30s. I haven't been in a serious relationship since I was 29. I have been very poor in my youth to being well off.

If I had a wife and kid, I probably would still be working and a happier man. But I also wouldn't be able to live the lifestyle I have had for the past 20 years. When I die, I will have no inheritators. The worst thing that happened to me since my mature adulthood is ball cancer.

My soul is around here somewhere but I can't seem to find it. I probably forgot I sold it a long time ago.

Find a wife. Find a community of families to mesh with and build a real life. Fucking on OF girls and funding college degrees with your IT money is lame. Hanging out with a bunch of middle aged single men is lame.
Click to expand...
this..fuck no we suppose to create our own families
 
Depends do you want to be a lion or a bear? If you don't what that means.

A lion is the king, he got a family and polygamist at that. His wife's go get the food for him and while they're working he's making sure the kids are good and fight other make lions who try to come in and kill him and his kids and fuck his wives damn near daily stress level high but he has a family to lean on

Or the..

A bear he's King to himself. Doesn't have a family he cares for but he gets some ass every now and then and he got kids he don't really have to take care of. He by himself all the time, have to find himself some food have to defend himself by himself. He can go places whenever he wants don't have to worry about making sure the family keep up and arguing with his chicks complaining about you need a bigger place for the family. Stress level low but he's own his own no help.
 
Old Man Cain said:
Depends do you want to be a lion or a bear? If you don't what that means.

A lion is the king, he got a family and polygamist at that. His wife's go get the food for him and while they're working he's making sure the kids are good and fight other make lions who try to come in and kill him and his kids and fuck his wives damn near daily stress level high but he has a family to lean on

Or the..

A bear he's King to himself. Doesn't have a family he cares for but he gets some ass every now and then and he got kids he don't really have to take care of. He by himself all the time, have to find himself some food have to defend himself by himself. He can go places whenever he wants don't have to worry about making sure the family keep up and arguing with his chicks complaining about you need a bigger place for the family. Stress level low but he's own his own no help.
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"Doesn't have a family he cares for but he gets some ass every now and then and he got kids he don't really have to take care of."

Not of fan of raising kids in broken homes. Id rather just be childfree instead of creating households like this
 
Black_Samson said:
Put it like this.

Some CDL drivers have their wives or husbands on the road and some don’t.

Take from that what you will.
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I was a truck driver for a year. That shit gets lonely. While I was in training both of my trainers passed time by constantly talking to their partners throughout the day.

I'd feel bad for any single trucker. That shit ain't a life worth living long term. Id rather be a merchant marine. Like atleast those niggas can spend a few weeks or a few months at home before heading back to work.
 
ZMaKEa said:
Men are solitary creatures.

A man is supposed to create his own life through his strength and guile and build his own little fiefdom.
Click to expand...

This is laughably untrue. Like I can't think of a single human culture on earth where that's the norm.

More often than not, men are supposed to build themselves up for the purpose of finding a mate and passing on genes. Traditionally, the loner men were the ones that weren't capable of attracting a suitable mate.

Even most loners, aren't really solitary creature. Human beings in general are social animals.
 
Might-Guy said:
I was a truck driver for a year. That shit gets lonely. While I was in training both of my trainers passed time by constantly talking to their partners throughout the day.

I'd feel bad for any single trucker. That shit ain't a life worth living long term. Id rather be a merchant marine. Like atleast those niggas can spend a few weeks or a few months at home before heading back to work.
Click to expand...
Welp…

Close thread

Ain’t nothing left to be said after this.

Either you enjoy the feeling that comes from chancing that 72 hours after smashing a lot lizard of whether that itch at the base gon persist or….

You gon take the chance and settle down.




I’d rather be married and not worry about whether I rolled the condom down far enough.
 
The Lonious Monk said:
This is laughably untrue. Like I can't think of a single human culture on earth where that's the norm.

More often than not, men are supposed to build themselves up for the purpose of finding a mate and passing on genes. Traditionally, the loner men were the ones that weren't capable of attracting a suitable mate.

Even most loners, aren't really solitary creature. Human beings in general are social animals.
Click to expand...

You suck at reading.

The epidemic of male loneliness across the developed world proves me right. Even men that are married with a family are expressing loneliness.

The brother was asking about if men can be single forever and create a brotherhood like women do and the answer is no.

Men are solitary. You focus on your self, make your money, and get a mate and build your adult life with your mate. That's it.

Ain't no man over 40, running around town with a bunch of single male friends. Women do that, they have a cultural framework to do that. Men don't.

I bet if there was survey about how many deep friendships men make after the age of 35, it would be few.
 
I think it is
House stays clean
You can go & come as you please
You dictate how you spend
Peace of mind
 
ZMaKEa said:
You suck at reading.

The epidemic of male loneliness across the developed world proves me right. Even men that are married with a family are expressing loneliness.

The brother was asking about if men can be single forever and create a brotherhood like women do and the answer is no.

Men are solitary. You focus on your self, make your money, and get a mate and build your adult life with your mate. That's it.

Ain't no man over 40, running around town with a bunch of single male friends. Women do that, they have a cultural framework to do that. Men don't.

I bet if there was survey about how many deep friendships men make after the age of 35, it would be few.
Click to expand...

I'm not sure you understand what words mean. You say in this post that men are solitary, but you contradict that claim at least twice in your own post.

You point out that there is a male loneliness epidemic. How in the world do you believe that proves your point? If men are feeling lonely that means they aren't getting the social fulfillment that they need, which means that they don't want solitary lives.

Then you acknowledge that finding a mate is part of the typical male experience. Again, that would mean that men aren't solitary.

I'd agree with you that most men don't make new deep friendships past their mid-thirties, but that's not because men are running around living as loners. It's because by that time, most men have an established circle of friends and family and don't need any new connections.
 
The Lonious Monk said:
I'm not sure you understand what words mean. You say in this post that men are solitary, but you contradict that claim at least twice in your own post.

You point out that there is a male loneliness epidemic. How in the world do you believe that proves your point? If men are feeling lonely that means they aren't getting the social fulfillment that they need, which means that they don't want solitary lives.

Then you acknowledge that finding a mate is part of the typical male experience. Again, that would mean that men aren't solitary.

I'd agree with you that most men don't make new deep friendships past their mid-thirties, but that's not because men are running around living as loners. It's because by that time, most men have an established circle of friends and family and don't need any new connections.
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Men are solitary in the sense they don't bond with other men. Men create institutions as a way to mediate how they interact with the world. Men bond with institutions and ideas. Men prefer being alone if they can't join something better than themselves or a create something better than themselves.

The reason why most men have friends because they played a sport, joined the band, joined a frat, joined the military, joined a neighborhood gang.

That's how men create friendship groups.

That's totally different than the women. Women bond person to person. They meet someone at a concert, they become best friends for life. They meet someone at the airport and they exchange numbers. They go to a bar and get a compliment from a woman and strike up a conversation and hang out later.

Today, young men don't play sports. They don't join gangs. They don't join the military. They don't go to college. They don't participate in institutions whatsoever compared to when I was young.

Established men make deep friendships in life through their family and work. They have a kid that plays sports, they end up hanging out with other dads and father figures. Their wife is religious, so they go to church and join the men's group. Their job is unionized so they join the union.

As older men die off, institutions that held men together has died off because younger men have not stepped up and replace us. This is all over the world.

Without the institutions that socializes men, what have men done? Nothing. That's the solitary nature of manhood. Most men haven't even realized this until it became a political issue because of low birth rates, marriage rates, right wing extremism and anti-feminism. Even then, nobody created anything to replace the institutions that supported men throughout their lifespan. It's the same man up bullshit but a little nicer.

Women have the deeper networks and relationships than men because they connect with people. They are invest in people. Men don't. Men invest in ideas and institutions and that guides us towards people.

Young women are complaining about romantic lonelinesss and they are buying houses with their best friend instead of with a man. Men can't find a mate, they join forums and obscure YouTube channels and talk about their issues there.

Institutions handhold men through the social world. So when the young brother asked if it's possible mature men can bond and interact with other each as lifelong single men the same way women do, the answer is no. As a mature man, your socialization is going come through family and work and whatever friendships you maintained from your youth. Women create deep friendships all throughout their lifespan, men rarely do without meditation through institutions we participate in.
 
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ZMaKEa said:
Men are solitary in the sense they don't bond with other men. Men create institutions as a way to mediate how they interact with the world. Men bond with institutions and ideas. Men prefer being alone if they can't join something better than themselves or a create something better than themselves.

The reason why most men have friends because they played a sport, joined the band, joined a frat, joined the military, joined a neighborhood gang.

That's how men create friendship groups.

That's totally different than the women. Women bond person to person. They meet someone at a concert, they become best friends for life. They meet someone at the airport and they exchange numbers. They go to a bar and get a compliment from a woman and strike up a conversation and hang out later.

Today, young men don't play sports. They don't join gangs. They don't join the military. They don't go to college. They don't participate in institutions whatsoever compared to when I was young.

Established men make deep friendships in life through their family and work. They have a kid that plays sports, they end up hanging out with other dads and father figures. Their wife is religious, so they go to church and join the men's group. Their job is unionized so they join the union.

As older men die off, institutions that held men together has died off because younger men have not stepped up and replace us. This is all over the world.

Without the institutions that socializes men, what have men done? Nothing. That's the solitary nature of manhood. Most men haven't even realized this until it became a political issue because of low birth rates, marriage rates, right wing extremism and anti-feminism. Even then, nobody created anything to replace the institutions that supported men throughout their lifespan. It's the same man up bullshit but a little nicer.

Women have the deeper networks and relationships than men because they connect with people. They are invest in people. Men don't. Men invest in ideas and institutions and that guides us towards people.

Young women are complaining about romantic lonelinesss and they are buying houses with their best friend instead of with a man. Men can't find a mate, they join forums and obscure YouTube channels and talk about their issues there.

Institutions handhold men through the social world. So when the young brother asked if it's possible mature men can bond and interact with other each as lifelong single men the same way women do, the answer is no. As a mature man, your socialization is going come through family and work and whatever friendships you maintained from your youth. Women create deep friendships all throughout their lifespan, men rarely do without meditation through institutions we participate in.
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I see where you're coming from here. I think still being a little too general, but there is merit to what you're saying.
 
Looking at the actual question being asked, my question is "worth what?"

That makes it seem like you have to sacrifice something to be an eternal bachelor. My assumption was that dudes that choose to go down that route don't really want a lasting attachment to someone and aren't interested in building a family. So they aren't really sacrificing anything. As long as they handle their affairs properly enough to make sure they have options when they get old, I don't see where they are actually losing anything.

That said, I don't know how many men out there truly go their whole lives without wanting a partner and have no interest in fathering children. I think a more interesting question is why would a man want to be a lifelong bachelor. I suspect in most cases it comes from witnessing the fallout from people who are bad at relationships.
 
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