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AP2.5

AP2.5

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How much about your old relationship do you share?

Are you careful to to not to bash your ex?

Do you give it to em straight up?

Do you discuss your shortcomings and the things you could've done differently even if it may paint you in a not so good light initially?

Discuss
 
When it comes to meeting a new person I'll answer depending on the questions. I'm not the type to bash exes though that negative energy could send the wrong message that I'd do that to her as well. I'm pretty open though and if it leads to deeper conversations I'm with it. I'm not going to paint any past relationship as perfect and I damn sure wasn't myself.
 
Don't bring your old shit into a new situation...new situation will end just like the old one. We have to stop that mess. "Old ways don't open new doors".

I don't believe there's a reason to talk about the particulars of the old relationship with a new person, *especially* in the beginning...nobody wants to hear alladat. Never bash the ex...it gives pressed and still invested. For me, it would be a major turnoff...like, why are you trying to pursue something with me and you're still attached to the ex/old relationship?🚩 Nah...I'm not about to knowingly step into the rebound role.

If you're just having general relationship conversation and you want to speak on how you've overcome any shortcomings that may have lead to the demise of the relationship or have added to your growth/maturity, I think that's cool. But if you're still dealing with those same shortcomings then you probably should forgo pursuing a new relationship for a while and work on that...just my opinion.
 
Scandalust313 said:
Don't bring your old shit into a new situation...new situation will end just like the old one. We have to stop that mess. "Old ways don't open new doors".

I don't believe there's a reason to talk about the particulars of the old relationship with a new person, *especially* in the beginning...nobody wants to hear alladat. Never bash the ex...it gives pressed and still invested. For me, it would be a major turnoff...like, why are you trying to pursue something with me and you're still attached to the ex/old relationship?🚩 Nah...I'm not about to knowingly step into the rebound role.

If you're just having general relationship conversation and you want to speak on how you've overcome any shortcomings that may have lead to the demise of the relationship or have added to your growth/maturity, I think that's cool. But if you're still dealing with those same shortcomings then you probably should forgo pursuing a new relationship for a while and work on that...just my opinion.
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At what point, if at any do you think it's a good idea to discuss particulars?
 
Scandalust313 said:
I don't think it's a good idea

Why do you want to talk about your old relationship/ex with a "potential"?
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Not that you "want" to but I think it's natural for someone to wonder how, if they perceive you to be a pretty good to decent person off a first impression, how is it that you became single.

For instance, if a woman is at a point where she thinks she's ready to be married so her intent is to date to lead to marriage and she asks the guy why his last relationship ended or the topic just kinda comes up and he says it was bc his last situation ended cause she too wanted to get married and he wasn't ready or for wherever reason, it just didn't happen, do you feel that's information the new person should know?
 
AP2.5 said:
Not that you "want" to but I think it's natural for someone to wonder how, if they perceive you to be a pretty good to decent person off a first impression, how is it that you became single.
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Ok...why not just say something like "I had some unresolved issues at the time and it led to the breakdown of the relationship"?

If you just have to let another person know that your issues alone didn't lead to the demise of the r'ship, and your ex had a part in it too, then "we both had unresolved issues that we should've, but didn't address, before we got together so, of course the r'ship fell apart. Since then, I've worked/continue to work on those things and I'm more mature now." or whatever.

For instance, if a woman is at a point where she thinks she's ready to be married so her intent is to date to lead to marriage and she asks the guy why his last relationship ended or the topic just kinda comes up and he says it was bc his last situation ended cause she too wanted to get married and he wasn't ready or for wherever reason, it just didn't happen, do you feel that's information the new person should know?
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Just say "we weren't on the same page at the same time'" or "we wanted different things".

If you meet someone and they tell you they're dating with the intent to find a marriage partner, but you aren't, then you tell them that isn't your intent.
 
I think the natural curiosity in most people will want to have a deeper dive into what those issues were that caused y'all not to be on the same page no?
 
AP2.5 said:
I think the natural curiosity in most people will want to have a deeper dive into what those issues were that caused y'all not to be on the same page no?
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That's on them

You tell new person about YOUR individual issues, if you're dating to try to foster an exclusive r'ship with them and if you're still grappling with those issues. Your ex shouldn't even enter the convo

If this is the very beginning stages of dating and getting to know each other and not at the point of even talking about being in a r'ship with each other, then that "deep dive" is doing too much
 
If they ask...I share. Vice versa.

Never had an issue wit anyone I've dealt wit before. Shyt just came up organically during conversations. I did had one who came off like she was interrogating me. Cut that off.

It's natural for two people to wanna know the others past relationship. Why things ended. How they may feel about their now ex. That last part important. I definitely wanted know if there was residual feelings still lingering or not.

If they bashed them...not my place to correct them. That's how they feel. I was guilty of that about my ex. Others didn't had any issues wit it. Mainly b/c they could relate.
 
Not the type to bash my exes. Especially since I usually don't have super-messy breakups. If we find ourselves in a conversation about our previous relationships or they're wondering why me and my last s/o broke up, I'll give them the facts to the situation. No need to try to kick a person's back in to other people when you are no longer together.

You can tell a lot about a person by the way they speak about their ex.
 
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I’m open so I’ll willingly speak about an ex if asked. I wouldn’t Volunteer the info

Would I bash the ex? Nah I would just say it was my fault it didn’t work out and hold myself accountable in that way

they like when you own up to it lol just say you learned from it and it’s all good

(Knowing good and well you didn’t)
 
I don’t share much information until asked. I don’t bash him either. I’m pretty open and straightforward and that’s why they run.
 
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