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How long is long enough to forgive an ex and try again?

My wife knew my ex and how she played me. We were talking earlier this year and the subject of my ex came up. Wife was like "I wonder what she's doing nowadays" and I replied "Ionno... prolly dead by now." and the wife was like "You know... It's probably time to let that go, that was sooo long ago she's probably not even the same person she was."

Do you really need forgiveness to grow? I don't see that being a necessity like that.
Imo, yes

It's not for the other person, it's for you

Just look at your last post. You've been married all this time and still thinking about how wrong she did you. Your wife brought up a great point. What if she isn't the same person today vs twenty years ago. Are you the same person?

Why can you progress and grow but she can't?
 
That shit tragic.

Cuz I'd want to. I'd want to like shit..

But I'm a cold dude. My ego wouldn't allow it. I can be my own worst enemy.... Cuz I'd ignore the fuck outta her
 
My wife knew my ex and how she played me. We were talking earlier this year and the subject of my ex came up. Wife was like "I wonder what she's doing nowadays" and I replied "Ionno... prolly dead by now." and the wife was like "You know... It's probably time to let that go, that was sooo long ago she's probably not even the same person she was."

Do you really need forgiveness to grow? I don't see that being a necessity like that
.

No. I know it sounds good to say this but i really think you can live your life just fine not forgiving everybody for everything. Some shit is drastic and how does not forgiving translate to not letting go? I think we put certain unnaturql expectaruon upon our emotions in an effort to be the bigger person.
 
Imo, yes

It's not for the other person, it's for you

Just look at your last post. You've been married all this time and still thinking about how wrong she did you. Your wife brought up a great point. What if she isn't the same person today vs twenty years ago. Are you the same person?

Why can you progress and grow but she can't?


But why should he even be concerned about her growth or life.
 
Do you really need forgiveness to grow? I don't see that being a necessity like that.
Imo if you don't look at her with animosity in your heart/mind but merely lack the desire to interact with her that is equal to forgiveness.

I don't believe forgiveness includes allowing the other person to say sorry. Everyone has their lot in life, and theirs is not being able to say their peace.
 
forgive an ex?

try again?

thats like taking a shit then reaching in the toliet and trying to shove it back in your ass

let go and let god

:whew:
 
Everyone is in a different place in their walk

To me forgiveness is about what I need to do for my growth. Once I've released that, I can start to heal. Me holding onto it just keeps me in bondage in several areas that I don't need to be wasting energy in
i never got this.........why does and how does forgiving someone help you to heal?i can hate someone and never speak or think about them for them to even stop anything im doing. so how does that work for you?
 
Imo, yes

It's not for the other person, it's for you

Just look at your last post. You've been married all this time and still thinking about how wrong she did you. Your wife brought up a great point. What if she isn't the same person today vs twenty years ago. Are you the same person?

Why can you progress and grow but she can't?
honestly......i could care less if they was the same person..... a mistake is one thing....but to cheat AND clean out the crib....and want to connect?
nah.........you made your decision..stick with it
 
i never got this.........why does and how does forgiving someone help you to heal?i can hate someone and never speak or think about them for them to even stop anything im doing. so how does that work for you?

b/c it can distort your views of relationships moving forward

didnt think i had to explain this
 
b/c it can distort your views of relationships moving forward

didnt think i had to explain this
but you do for some people....even forgiving can still distort your view if thats the type person you are who tends to want to not be hurt again.
forgiving doesnt stop you from wanting to not be hurt.

so why forgive for something someone did to intentionally hurt you?
i cant see the logic in it.

now....i can not forgive someone and still proceed into another relationship without the baggage...but whether i forgive or not..wont stop me from looking and seeing signs of red flags.
 
honestly......i could care less if they was the same person..... a mistake is one thing....but to cheat AND clean out the crib....and want to connect?
nah.........you made your decision..stick with it
first....couldnt care less

second...20 years ago, i was 15 years old. What i look like having a grudge against a chick who was one year younger than me? c'mon

now, let me clarify, i'm not advocating that a woman who was beaten by an ex just forgives dude and life is all peachy

but there are some things that are so trivial in the grand scheme of things that its best to chalk it up to relationship immaturity and keep it moving
 
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I was wondering where all the bitter men came to congregate

Good thread yo
 
first....couldnt care less

second...20 years ago, i was 15 years old. What i look like having a grudge against a chick who was one year younger than me? c'mon

now, let me clarify, i'm not advocating that a woman who was beaten by an ex just forgives dude and life is all peachy

but there are some things that are so trivial in the grand scheme of things that its best to chalk it up to relationship immaturity and keep it moving
certain things are immaturity...and other things are not.

it was a dude on wshh that was sitting on the bathroom floor holding his dying dog that was having convulsions. his girl poisoned the dog because whatever reason but it was immature.......but to see how dude felt about his dude...i dont think he could ever forgive her. but if 20 yrs later she asks for it...should he forgive her?


but anyway

we all handle things differently.....my wife aint got shit to do with my ex and i hate that bitch and wish death on her as a way to end a sentence instead of using a period.
*shrugs*
 
I was wondering where all the bitter men came to congregate

Good thread yo
see this that corny shit........f you chi
why cant niggas talk about the what if without your fuckery?
i swear imma choke the shit outta you
 
but you do for some people....even forgiving can still distort your view if thats the type person you are who tends to want to not be hurt again.
forgiving doesnt stop you from wanting to not be hurt.

so why forgive for something someone did to intentionally hurt you?
i cant see the logic in it.

now....i can not forgive someone and still proceed into another relationship without the baggage...but whether i forgive or not..wont stop me from looking and seeing signs of red flags.

like its one thing to look back on a relationship and have retrospective thoughts to be like "damn, i could've done this differently" or whatever, but its another to be hard on hoes for the rest of your life b/c a chick you was talking to was messing around in ya'lls 20s
 
certain things are immaturity...and other things are not.

it was a dude on wshh that was sitting on the bathroom floor holding his dying dog that was having convulsions. his girl poisoned the dog because whatever reason but it was immature.......but to see how dude felt about his dude...i dont think he could ever forgive her. but if 20 yrs later she asks for it...should he forgive her?


but anyway

we all handle things differently.....my wife aint got shit to do with my ex and i hate that bitch and wish death on her as a way to end a sentence instead of using a period.
*shrugs*

different scenario

i know certain people view their animals as children

if his girl poisoned his dog, he should've called the authorities and he might not be able to forgive her, and im not advocating that he should

im the king of "its not black and white" , so dont try to take my comments and make them into some one size fits all approach

i think A LOT of shit can be forgiven, but people's pride and ego get in the way of that
 
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see this that corny shit........f you chi
why cant niggas talk about the what if without your fuckery?
i swear imma choke the shit outta you
This the type of energy I live for

State or Country you wanna make ya side pieces a widow b
 
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